Free HEFNER MONOLOGUES! With beer! Theoretically!

[thehefner]

So! Who wants to see my new show and drink beer (it's BYOB, but I'll try to get a nice case of inexpensive something-something)?

Then come on by tommx's place next Friday, May 8th, for a special rough-as-hell run-through of THE HEFNER MONOLOGUES: HOW HEFNERIAN! Help prepare me for my return to triumphant return to the Orlando Fringe Festival, in the hopes that I don't make a complete and utter boob of myself!



But in the hopes of avoiding self-boobery, I'll be taking a day or two to hermit up in the Catoctin Mountain so I can work on the script without being distracted by my mother, my grandmother, my grandmother's friends, my stepfather, Mom's dogs, my needy bully of a cat, my grandmother's screeching Conure, or that robin who keeps humping his reflection in the window, leaving the glass smeared with robin jizz.

Hopefully I can also swing by Sugarloaf Mountain Vineyard, where I can finally get a vineyard tour by no one less than Judge James McKenna himself. I honestly have no idea what I'll say to this great man to whom I once emasculated myself before an entire traffic court, but hopefully, there'll be a new story in this reunion. I'm hoping to someday finally find a way to use the Traffic Court Story in a new show.

Also, his wine is wicked good to boot.



In other news, I am Twatting on Twitter, even though it's seriously not long-winded-bastard-friendly. YOU ARE NOT REPLACING MY LJ ANYTIME SOON, TWITTER.

Speaking of/in all caps, I wanted to finally start officially following ZODIAC MOTHERFUCKER, only to discover this as his latest Tweet:

I GOTTA LEAVE THE STATE AND LAY LOW FOR AWHILE SO I WONT BE ONLINE SO ILL SEE YOU FUCKERS LATER IM OUT

3:42 PM Apr 22nd from web

I have no reason to doubt he's telling the truth. The internet shall be a poorer place until you return, or perish in a tragic flaming blimp accident. Whichever comes first. This can only be described in one way: WACK AS FUCK.

Comments

[nectarousness.livejournal.com]

Ooo, Twitter.

One of us. One of us. ONE OF US.

[thehefner.livejournal.com]

So far, it's a very strange combination of LJ's addictiveness but without the rich rewards of actual somewhat-depth due to its ADD nature.

[nectarousness.livejournal.com]

Yeah. The whole word limit is balls and most of the things written there are boring. I admit I've fallen victim to the latter.

Well, unless you count my other journal. :x

[gore-whore-5.livejournal.com]

Hehe. You said boob.

Can you email me with directions? I don't know where his house is. Also, what time should people show up?

[thehefner.livejournal.com]

Oh, for you, dear? Just saying boob isn't enough. For this, we need the big guns:



And directions... uh... those... would be good things to get. I'll send those along in a couple days!

[gore-whore-5.livejournal.com]

Holy crap! I fucking love MST3K! Thank you for giving me a nice dose of WTF in the morning. *big squishy boobie hugs*

[gnort.livejournal.com]

Kudos on turning twat into a verb. It works surprisingly well.

I have to give credit to your friend as well for beating me to the boob joke, and for having the better icon for it.

[thehefner.livejournal.com]

Wish I could take credit for it!



And well, Lea IS the Boob Authority, while I'm simply the Authoritative Boob.

[gore-whore-5.livejournal.com]

The "so have I" makes it. Fuck yes.

[dhairya.livejournal.com]

I'm in, please email me directions, because I don't know where this place is either.

[rosered2318.livejournal.com]

i believe i will be there =)

[thehefner.livejournal.com]

Hu-to-the-ZZAH!

[leiacat.livejournal.com]

I'm interested. Where is this place and how do I get there?

[thehefner.livejournal.com]

Huzzah! :)

10105 Hereford Pl. Silver Spring. The actual read-thru starts around 8ish, so arrive around 7:30. It's BYOB, but I'll be bringing along a large bottle of Yellow Tail Cabernet for all.

[darkestnova.livejournal.com]

Everything ever written should contain the phrase, "leaving the glass smeared with robin jizz."