Free HEFNER MONOLOGUES! With beer! Theoretically!

[thehefner]

So! Who wants to see my new show and drink beer (it's BYOB, but I'll try to get a nice case of inexpensive something-something)?

Then come on by tommx's place next Friday, May 8th, for a special rough-as-hell run-through of THE HEFNER MONOLOGUES: HOW HEFNERIAN! Help prepare me for my return to triumphant return to the Orlando Fringe Festival, in the hopes that I don't make a complete and utter boob of myself!



But in the hopes of avoiding self-boobery, I'll be taking a day or two to hermit up in the Catoctin Mountain so I can work on the script without being distracted by my mother, my grandmother, my grandmother's friends, my stepfather, Mom's dogs, my needy bully of a cat, my grandmother's screeching Conure, or that robin who keeps humping his reflection in the window, leaving the glass smeared with robin jizz.

Hopefully I can also swing by Sugarloaf Mountain Vineyard, where I can finally get a vineyard tour by no one less than Judge James McKenna himself. I honestly have no idea what I'll say to this great man to whom I once emasculated myself before an entire traffic court, but hopefully, there'll be a new story in this reunion. I'm hoping to someday finally find a way to use the Traffic Court Story in a new show.

Also, his wine is wicked good to boot.



In other news, I am Twatting on Twitter, even though it's seriously not long-winded-bastard-friendly. YOU ARE NOT REPLACING MY LJ ANYTIME SOON, TWITTER.

Speaking of/in all caps, I wanted to finally start officially following ZODIAC MOTHERFUCKER, only to discover this as his latest Tweet:

I GOTTA LEAVE THE STATE AND LAY LOW FOR AWHILE SO I WONT BE ONLINE SO ILL SEE YOU FUCKERS LATER IM OUT

3:42 PM Apr 22nd from web

I have no reason to doubt he's telling the truth. The internet shall be a poorer place until you return, or perish in a tragic flaming blimp accident. Whichever comes first. This can only be described in one way: WACK AS FUCK.

Comments

[gnort.livejournal.com]

Kudos on turning twat into a verb. It works surprisingly well.

I have to give credit to your friend as well for beating me to the boob joke, and for having the better icon for it.

[thehefner.livejournal.com]

Wish I could take credit for it!



And well, Lea IS the Boob Authority, while I'm simply the Authoritative Boob.

[gore-whore-5.livejournal.com]

The "so have I" makes it. Fuck yes.