I have a legacy to uphold, after all

[thehefner]

At the Virgin Megastore in NYC, I found a small hardcover book, entitled HEF'S LITTLE BLACK BOOK, by Hugh M. Hefner and Bill Zehme. Essentially, it's Cousin Hugh imparting his wisdom on life, love, women, and style.

Well of course I had to buy it, if only to figure out what I'm doing wrong. After all, my father is a Hefner and in his time he's been a stylish man-about-town with a Rolls Royce, a brilliant oboe career, and has bedded over 66 women in his time (there are advantages to being a college professor). And all sex aside, in all things I'm a little less Hef and a little more cats and crying. So maybe this book'll shape me up. And besides, if my novel's never gonna get published I'd like at least one book on the shelf with my name on it.

Man. His birthday is April 9th. Maybe I should send him a card. I want to know him, I really do. He and I share a deep passion for movies, I just know we could talk about films for hours and hours. I tried to send him a letter of appeal some time ago, but got no response. I think I made the damn fool mistake of saying that I wanted no money and then inviting him to my high school graduation, which can be easily interpreted as a handout. I just want to know the man. And go to the mansion at an age where, y'know, it actually *counts*.

Ah well. In the meantime I suppose all I can do is get that smoking jacket off of ebay and read the book. I'm sure there are some who would like to see me Heffed out in the full ensemble.

Comments

yes, you know how i feel about that smoking jacket..

[erzebetbathory.livejournal.com]

and i say become a professor, that must be it, i want to sleep with almost all of mine, so there is definitely some appeal there. and they don't even have to be good looking, which you are anyways, so you're already ahead of the game.

Re: yes, you know how i feel about that smoking jacket..

[thehefner.livejournal.com]

Let me guess, Weigel's one of the few you don't want to sleep with. What can I say, I'm a mindreader.

My Dad's Dr. Hefner, and I've sometimes thought about going down that route myself. If I became a professor, though, as I've often considered, would you still consider a literature or even a drama professor to be sexy? Is it just the title of professor, then? The position of power, combined with an assumed superiority in knowledge in their specific field?

I could teach drama while wearing PJs and a smoking jacket, how's that sound?

Dude... Hefner... I had no idea

[eldridgeprime.livejournal.com]

Heffie... My man... You must introduce me to your uncle. And his mansion of babes, while we're at it. Seriously.

Please. I'll grovel if it helps. ;-)

Re: yes, you know how i feel about that smoking jacket..

[erzebetbathory.livejournal.com]

literature, yes. drama, not so much. it's not just the title, i would have to say it's definitely the assumed superiority in knowledge thing. but it has to be more than assumed, it has to be expereinced to some extent. (which is the opposite thing with weigel, i have personally experienced that he is a no good hack who knows nothing about what he pretends to, and should, know... loser hack)

umm, so yeah

Re: yes, you know how i feel about that smoking jacket..

[thehefner.livejournal.com]

Yes, see, I had an inkling that you wouldn't consider drama as such. But then, you've never had a drama course. I've known several a girl to have crushes on their drama teachers. Well, okay, it's just the one, and her teacher is a hot young guy who moonlights as Frank N. Further at the local Rocky Horror. So yeah, I suppose that counts.

Ah well, I think I could be good with either literature or drama. With literature I could have a whole forum to talk about my love of these books. Hold on, how about film studies? Can a film studies professor be sexy? I probably wouldn't go through film school for graduate school, so it's probably moot, but lord knows I could teach whole classes on movies and movie history. What think you?

[fishymcb.livejournal.com]

I want to get into the Playboy Mansion for one reason and one reason only...to smother Fred Durst in his sleep.

Re: yes, you know how i feel about that smoking jacket..

[erzebetbathory.livejournal.com]

yeah, those girls probably liked drama more than i do. not to say that i don't enjoy and appreciate drama, because i do, but i just don't have a strong enough interest in it, i guess. and i had the major major hots for a film studies professor i had twice, but he was a philosophy professor who also happened to know practically everything about film, so that was likely the attraction there, seeing as how everything had a philosophical spin on it.