THE MATRIX CAN SUCK MY ASS: I'VE SEEN "EQUILIBRIUM"!

[thehefner]

Oh. My. Motherfucking. GOD.

Christian Bale. Sean Bean. Taye Diggs. Angus "Titus's Brother" MacFayden. Emily Watson. Sean Pewtree. In a 1984/Farenheit 451-esque negative utopia story about supressing emotions and underground movements and blah blah blah that's all well and good. But the FIGHTS. Oh my motherfucking God, the FIGHT SCENES IN THIS MOVIE...

Apparently, in this world gunplay has its own martial arts style of combat. And they milk that to the very last drop. But there're are samurai swords, and when you have Bale as a master in both of these, cutting down groups of black-leather-clad soldiers, then dueling with an evil as fuck Taye Diggs... I was on the edge of my seat, jaw dropped, contents of bowels nearly in my pants. WOW. WOW WOW WOWEE WOW WOW.

Anyone who thought that "The Matrix" revolutionized gunfights... fuck you. That was CGI child's play. Chow-Yun Fat and John Woo, the men who did with a gun what Van Gogh did with a paintbrush, you have been dethroned. This even beat out Wolverine's berzerker rage from X2 as the single most badass one-man slaughter I've seen in a movie.

I'm ranting and it's making no sense. See "Equilibrium" now. If you have any appreciation for the art of action, see this movie now. Get back to me later.

Wow.

Comments

[tompurdue.livejournal.com]

I guess I just have no appreciation for the art of gunplay. It was all well and good, but the core lameness of the plot overwhelmed it.

[thehefner.livejournal.com]

Yes, even without sleeping on it I knew the story was weak and pretty lame. No argument there. If there had been more fights maybe the movie would have done better, but alas. I'm probably not going to buy the film ultimately, but those fights, for me, made the whole film worthwhile.

[surrealname.livejournal.com]

john the matrix sucked ass any way and as a comic fan you should have known that already, we've seen the matrix done a hundred times before in a hundred different ways and done better each time.

[tazira.livejournal.com]

Some good performances, and lovely visuals. I have a weak spot for Equilibrium myself.

[thehefner.livejournal.com]

Yes, but now it sucks even *more* in comparison!

[ortugatay.livejournal.com]

oh lord i love bale...and the face-slice...eee