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Ugh, I feel like Slimer came in my mouth
Sep. 13th, 2007 11:41 amSo I said, "Hell with it," and sucked down four egg whites. Just on their own, Rocky Balboa style, minus the yolks (the dogs shall have a treat later). I figured, why endure another bowl of slimy oatmeal? Just bite the bullet and then wash it down with regular, less slimy oatmeal. Although according to the list Carolyn gave me today after our workout, I really should have had eight egg whites.
"It's not a practical list," she warned me. "We're trying to go for that cover model look here, and this is what those cover models eat. Five small meals a day, eight ounces of protein per meal, etc. Those models you see smiling on those covers? They're not happy people. They're miserable and gassy and smell bad. So you can either follow this gross list to the letter, or you can step up your workouts."
I think I'll try to find a happy balance.
I've been trying to steer clear of sugar, aside from fruit (in smoothies or, sometimes, in the oatmeal). Speaking of smoothies, the protein powder really does its best to make those yummy drinks taste mealy. Looks like I'm also gonna need to restock on chicken and fish. The local co-op has this tuna, Eco Fish... $8.00 a can. But wow oh wow, it's the best canned tuna I've ever had, aside from this one great kind packed in olive oil that I can't find anymore. Man oh man, trying to suck down this much protein is gonna be a pain in the arse. Speaking of which, my arse is also slimming down.
The hardest part right now, it seems to me, is trying to lose that spare tire. I'm gonna miss beer for the next month and a half. Maybe I'll sneak one in every now and again. But Carolyn said the beer goes right to the old gut. Hmm... I wonder if I can have a glass of wine and be OK?
Meantime, I've had the damnedest time trying to find black pinstripe pants.
Just black, black-black, with white stripes.
There are a LOT of striped shirts. Those seem to be in fashion. But unless I start looking in the expensive suits section, I couldn't find a good pair of pants for the life of me! You'd think even Hot frickin' Topic would have 'em, but noooo! Ah well, I feel guilty enough for buying suspenders from them as it is.
Really, I might as well go for a pinstripe suit, just to have on hand. David Tennant on DOCTOR WHO has only emphasized my belief in pinstripe suits. Always a good idea. This one has really taken my fancy, but no matter how "black" they say it is, it still looks gray. Fancy enough to have in my wardrobe, but too gray for my Halloween purposes. This one and this one look much better, and they're all the same price (I think a hundred bucks is reasonable for a snazzy suit, yes?), but dash it all, I'm just so hesitant to buy clothes off-line without having someone to eyeball and let me know if it looks good on me.
(Put it this way: I didn't intend for my trademark $3 blue suit to hang so badly off me; thematically, it just worked out for the best!)
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dhairya, you paying attention up above? What think you, as well? (Also, again, please send me your e-mail addy, so's I may send you the list!)
Also,jellied once suggested I start wearing Chelsea boots. Y'know, as part of my efforts to snazzify my style up a bit (I now wear the bowler derby as often as possible.) What about these? As I've inherited my father's wide feet, this is one of the few catalogs I trust to give me shoes that could actually fit.
My wardrobe just generally needs a kick in the pants. Also, new pants.
Oh, and my father's friend, the optometrist, strongly advised against using special effects contact lenses, as I've never worn contacts before. Best not risk it then. Ah well, woulda looked great.
"It's not a practical list," she warned me. "We're trying to go for that cover model look here, and this is what those cover models eat. Five small meals a day, eight ounces of protein per meal, etc. Those models you see smiling on those covers? They're not happy people. They're miserable and gassy and smell bad. So you can either follow this gross list to the letter, or you can step up your workouts."
I think I'll try to find a happy balance.
I've been trying to steer clear of sugar, aside from fruit (in smoothies or, sometimes, in the oatmeal). Speaking of smoothies, the protein powder really does its best to make those yummy drinks taste mealy. Looks like I'm also gonna need to restock on chicken and fish. The local co-op has this tuna, Eco Fish... $8.00 a can. But wow oh wow, it's the best canned tuna I've ever had, aside from this one great kind packed in olive oil that I can't find anymore. Man oh man, trying to suck down this much protein is gonna be a pain in the arse. Speaking of which, my arse is also slimming down.
The hardest part right now, it seems to me, is trying to lose that spare tire. I'm gonna miss beer for the next month and a half. Maybe I'll sneak one in every now and again. But Carolyn said the beer goes right to the old gut. Hmm... I wonder if I can have a glass of wine and be OK?
Meantime, I've had the damnedest time trying to find black pinstripe pants.
Just black, black-black, with white stripes.
There are a LOT of striped shirts. Those seem to be in fashion. But unless I start looking in the expensive suits section, I couldn't find a good pair of pants for the life of me! You'd think even Hot frickin' Topic would have 'em, but noooo! Ah well, I feel guilty enough for buying suspenders from them as it is.
Really, I might as well go for a pinstripe suit, just to have on hand. David Tennant on DOCTOR WHO has only emphasized my belief in pinstripe suits. Always a good idea. This one has really taken my fancy, but no matter how "black" they say it is, it still looks gray. Fancy enough to have in my wardrobe, but too gray for my Halloween purposes. This one and this one look much better, and they're all the same price (I think a hundred bucks is reasonable for a snazzy suit, yes?), but dash it all, I'm just so hesitant to buy clothes off-line without having someone to eyeball and let me know if it looks good on me.
(Put it this way: I didn't intend for my trademark $3 blue suit to hang so badly off me; thematically, it just worked out for the best!)
dhairya, you paying attention up above? What think you, as well? (Also, again, please send me your e-mail addy, so's I may send you the list!)Also,
jellied once suggested I start wearing Chelsea boots. Y'know, as part of my efforts to snazzify my style up a bit (I now wear the bowler derby as often as possible.) What about these? As I've inherited my father's wide feet, this is one of the few catalogs I trust to give me shoes that could actually fit. My wardrobe just generally needs a kick in the pants. Also, new pants.
Oh, and my father's friend, the optometrist, strongly advised against using special effects contact lenses, as I've never worn contacts before. Best not risk it then. Ah well, woulda looked great.
