That's it, that's the problem. I am a happy person. Absolutely.

[thehefner]

Damn. I have having such a hard time finishing this new Hefner Monologue, the one that is supposed to end the first book. I've been struggling with this one increasingly over the past couple months, picking away at it a bit, getting frustrated, going to write fanfic instead, repeat cycle. What used to flow out so naturally has become difficult and frustrating. I've been wondering what the hell happened, and I just realized what's wrong:

I'm happy.

Shit. I'm actually happy now. Nothing so ruins the artistic process like happiness! Charles Schultz said that the best work he ever did was in the two-year period in the 70's while he was going through a long and painful divorce. Now I'm happy, and the last thing I really want to do is throw myself back into the memories of those painful days, not even to write about how they resolved. I don't *want* to immerse myself in memories of Tammy, Misty, and Dave again, dash it all! My mind wants to ignore these and think about things that make me happy, like my girlfriend and comics! Right now, what I really wanna write is that Two-Face fanfic! Fanfiction over Hefner Monologues... god help me, how far have I fallen?!

Yet I've put this book off for too long. Once I get this last troublesome story done, then I will finally have a first draft of a complete, publishable book! I can't afford to just put it off anymore, it must get done!

Happiness. The artist's worst enemy.

Comments

[kali921.livejournal.com]

Happiness. The artist's worst enemy.

I beg to differ, sir.

You didn't know that Turgenev was inspired by the just and egalitarian aspects of 19th century Russian society, and was deliriously happy when he committed his greatest works to prose?

FOR SHAME.

A different path...

[charisma18.livejournal.com]

Pick up a copy of Julia Cameron's "The Artist's Way" sometime. It outlines a very powerful and quite inspiring process for deriving rich creativity from a stable and happy life.

Suffering is a tremendous wellspring of artistic inspiration, true. But delight is a well just as deep, if you know how to use it.

[adaptor.livejournal.com]

You've heard the quote, right? "A writer is a person for whom writing is harder than it is for most people." I think that truth has a lot to do with the dreaded happy.

"Fanfiction over Hefner Monologues... god help me, how far have I fallen?!"

Did you ever blow off a play with a director waiting in London to write Jean Moulin/Max Jacob slash? I didn't think so. No matter how low you fall I can barely see you from down here. When it comes to inappropriately timed fandom wank, we can certainly bring it, can't we?

Go finish the Hefner Monologues!!!!! Don't make me... uh... plot to one day buy you a cement mixer!

/I'm not really very evil, am I?
//le sigh

[thehefner.livejournal.com]

Well, I was being half-ironic. I also was inspired by Steve Martin's excellent essay, "The Effects of the Artist on Zoloft."

For shame, to me? For SHAME, you say?

Well. That's not very nice at all, now is it! ;)

Re: A different path...

[thehefner.livejournal.com]

That... could well be exactly one of the books I need to read, promptly. Particularly if it can truly help the way you say it can.

I've always been driven to create entertainment, art, and humor from the pain in my life. Without an edge of irony, I don't think I know quite what to do when faced with happy situations. It just feels like people wouldn't be that interested in it!

Gonna see if the library carries that book, definitely.

[thehefner.livejournal.com]

That is an excellent, excellent quote, one which I had not heard before!

Hehehe! Ohh, I laugh, but only because I can so easily see myself doing it too.

... Cement mixer? :)

[adaptor.livejournal.com]

Cement mixer is a drink you buy people who need a little does of public humiliation or who you just never want to hear ask you to buy them a drink again. It's lime juice and Baileys. They're thrown into the same glass and when you drink it you can actually feel the Baileys congeal in your mouth.

I should've known something was us when a friend of mine - a friend who knows his way around a coin - offered to buy me a drink. The only badge of honor out of that experience is I now have it in my arsenal of bar tricks should anyone else deserve similar treatment.

[thehefner.livejournal.com]

Ohhh man. I already have an idea what that's like. If I ever get the guts to write the big Hefner Monologue about my second girlfriend, you can read about the hi-larious night of lost virginity, drunken roleplaying, and vomited Irish Car Bombs. Four of them.

But that means I'll have to actually write it! Otherwise that story shall forever remain a mystery!

[gnort.livejournal.com]

I reckon you could just write a monologue about all the good stuff going on in your life. It would act as a balance to all the downer stuff and it would allow you to beat the process at its own game, with the arm that it tried to hit you with no less.

[spacechild.livejournal.com]

give in to the psyche, dude.. because lets face it.. your subconscious wants to chronicle the years of our friendship in painstaking, loving detail.

and the masses want it too.

baqck in reality, however.. at least it'd be good for some laughs.