I'm Not David Sedaris

[thehefner]

I'm reading SantaLand Diaries and while I am enjoying it immensely, part of me can't stop thinking of the five or six separate occasions that THE HEFNER MONOLOGUES have been likened to David Sedaris. I stress again, until just this hour I've *never* read Sedaris' work. The first three times I heard that, it was flattering and encouraging. Every time since has, well, kinda gotten me concerned. Defensive. Triggering my neuroses. I could just see it now:

"John Hefner-- the poor man's David Sedaris."

"That's Hefner guy's ok, but he's no David Sedaris."

"Pssh! Hefner's stuff is just cheap cash-ins trying to ride off the success of David Sedaris!

"Mr. Hefner! I LOVE your work, especially that story you did about being a Christmas Elf at Macy's!"

On the other hand, Dave Chapelle was the poor man's Chris Rock for several years there too. And honestly, I'm half-joking here. I'm not all that worried about it. Yet. I mean, let's get the books published first. Still, it gives me an idea for a Hefner Monologue, maybe even the title of a book:

THE HEFNER MONOLOGUES: I'M NOT DAVID SEDARIS

Maybe I can get David Sedaris to write the intro for it too. That'd be sweet.

(he said with a mixture of sincerity and knowing irony)

Comments

[heykidzcomix.livejournal.com]

You could be the heterosexual David Sedaris! (If you are, I mean. I don't know if you are.)

[thehefner.livejournal.com]

So he actually is gay? I thought so, but then I heard somewhere that he had a girl, and I went "BuhWHA?"

And indeed I am. But kind of emotional and flamboyant, in case you hadn't figured that out yet.

[themadhatter26.livejournal.com]

Steps to making your life complete:

1. Meet David Sedaris and befriend him.
2. Have David introduce you to his sister, Amy, and befriend her.
3. Have Amy introduce you to her friend, STEPHEN COLBERT.
4. Die a happy man, knowing you have seen glory first-hand.

[thehefner.livejournal.com]

Phase one: Meet David Sedaris.

Phase two: ?

Phase three: Profit!

[spacechild.livejournal.com]

did Marvel Zombies come out in a trade and i totally missed it?!

i'm scrolling the marvel site and it says it came out august 9th!!

whiskey.

tango.

foxtrot.

do you have it at the store? i was waiting for it to come out in trades.

and look at from this perspective.. you could also be called the middle-income man's Phillip Seymour Hoffman.

[thehefner.livejournal.com]

Yes, in a hardcover, 20 bucks! I could give you ten percent off, if'n you'd like.

Whup dee fuck.

[spacechild.livejournal.com]

i can actually get it for around ten through books a million, i found out. but i am going to wait until the 2nd volume comes out.

[spacechild.livejournal.com]

but thanks for the offer, bro.

i'm just antsy for stuff to read.

*twitch*

[thehefner.livejournal.com]

Umm, by second volume, do you mean trade paperback? Cuz there's no sequel currently planned, boyo!

And if you're itchy, dude, I got plenty of stuffs very much worth your reading time! Look back at my recommendations list!

[spacechild.livejournal.com]

so it IS the full story? odd, i saw another MZ book due out in october.

in that case, buy it and i'll pay you back. if you dont mind. you said $20?

where is your recommendations list?

[thehefner.livejournal.com]

Yep dude, it's the one and only. The zombie FF appear in Ultimate FF, which has gotten variant covers by the same MZ cover artist, but so far it's the only story. As it currently stands. A sequel may be on its way, but it's the full and complete saga.

And the list is here, you remember it:

http://cats-n-crying.livejournal.com/342770.html

[spacechild.livejournal.com]

is this stuff you are cool with loaning me?

if so..

ex-machina, invincible, some green lantern if you can think of a really good book to start with, nextwave i'm interested in, she-hulk has been looking interesting too, and punisher.

whatever is convenient to grab.

Winter Soldier i am going to buy outright once both volumes are out. and MZ i'll pay you for, if that works for you.

thoughts?

[spacechild.livejournal.com]

and let the geek-out begin.

[thehefner.livejournal.com]

Sure, but I'll need to buy some of 'em first. Looks like the perfect excuse for me to finally buy some of these trades!

[spacechild.livejournal.com]

hehe good excuse to buy stuff you dont need.