And so the training must go on...

[thehefner]

The final scene went off very well last night (especially regarding what was going on with my poor scene partner... remind me to tell you THAT story sometime). Afterwards, we spent a few hours talking about each of the students, and I was first up on the chopping block. No, honestly, it was actually great; I got a good deal of praise and honestly constructive criticism. It was universally agreed that, of all the students in the class, I had come the farthest. Kate, the teacher, agreed, but added that I also, "had a lot farther to go than many."

I'm a reforming Ham Actor. I've been told that I'm fearless on stage, and that's true to the extent that I will do anything for the reaction, anything the director tells me... but where I fall short is realistic, non-ham acting. When I try to be realistic, I end up coming off... not bold enough. Not big enough. My real insecure, shy nature comes through and I have to be really pushed to make bolder choices. I think too much, just as I do in life, rather than living in the moment and relaxing.

Kate said that this class ended up being so much about deconstruction for me, breaking me down and killing the ham instincts to "convey" and "perform" and "entertain" rather than living in the moment, playing for myself rather than an audience. As such, I wasn't able to adequately take all the lessons the first time around. Now, she emphasized beforehand that, regardless of what we might have believed, this class was not a pass/fail kind of situation. That said, she thinks I should take Principles of Realism again, so that now I'm finally ready to start building up.

So that's what I'm going to do. I'm going to take Principles (and Movement, that's the other thing she thoroughly recommended, but she doesn't think I really need Alexander Technique as much anymore, so I'll just do the workshop there), but now it's just a question of which Principles to take: Carol Arthur's or Serge Seiden's.

Because here's the thing about Serge: he's one third of the Unholy Trifecta of Studio. And yet, for reasons I am fully unable to articulate, I really like Serge. Let me tell you a quick story about Serge; a year after my internship at Studio, I went to go see a show. I had standing room, but I was told if a seat opened up after intermission, I was free to take it. Well, intermission came around and a seat did indeed open up. Serge (major teacher and Studio's Artistic Director and frequent director of shows) and I looked at the seat, then at each other, and he darted to snatch up the seat. The usher, an old acquaintance of mine from my internship days saw this and exclaimed a shocked and disappointed, "SERGE!" Serge looked at me, and suddenly "realized" that there was an actual paying customer here, much less a former intern, waiting for the seat, and went "oh, oh," as he reluctantly relinquished the seat.

My point is that, in a horror movie, Serge would be the guy throwing other people in the way of the monster to save his own ass. He's Mr. Cooper in NIGHT OF THE LIVING DEAD.

And yet, not only do I inexplicably still like him, but I'm also considering taking his class. Because he might actually be good for me. He might work me hard and actually make me a better actor, more so than just the "nicer" Miss Arthur. And maybe, just maybe, now that I've broken through all this, I won't be a shivering nervous wreck the second time around.

Comments

[sharrainchains.livejournal.com]

If Serge likes you - and I think he very well might like you - then he will help you and work you. If he doesn't, well I am still trying to heal... I got nothing from him (no teaching - no guidance - no work - no real feedback) - except abuse, after he decided he dislike me.

[thehefner.livejournal.com]

It might have been a disaster had I not already done the class with Kate first, but now that she's tenderized me, I think I'll be more receptive to him.

[lonebear.livejournal.com]

Serge is the better choice for you.

[thehefner.livejournal.com]

So am I thinking. I'm just hoping the voice telling me that isn't my masochism...

By the way, I had hoped to see you at last week's show, so I finally brought that comic. I gave it to chickenhat. Hopefully it'll get to you eventually, if you haven't already bought it elsewhere!

[findingjuliet.livejournal.com]

again, i'm sorry for missing it. but i do want to say that i'm proud of you. i've sat through four of those post-mortems now and i can tell you that having the teach tell you to repeat the class does not sit well with most people. i think you took everything you were supposed to from kate and ran with it. i agree with her assessment, just based on what i've seen you do till now, and i'm so glad you're open to exploring the more subtle, more grounded side of your performance. if you get that down and can then wind it up with your undoubtable stage prescence you could be a force to be reckoned with. in short ... i'm proud of you heffie ;) and i promise i won't miss next semesters scene (and hey, maybe we will run into each other since i'll be 'suffering' through comedy myself!)

[lialife.livejournal.com]

Comedy's fun, but hard. If Nancy's teaching it, you'll love her after JZ. We used to call her "Joy-lite", she got just as much work out of you without the requisite make you feel like crap part.

[tazira.livejournal.com]

Damn, it really does sound like you're on the verge of an interesting breakthrough to the next level. I want to see that Heffie. Because my favorite thing I ever saw you do was the Nazi collaborator. There was a moment at the end of that play that moved you, it was real naked Heffie, as opposed to 'lime and the coconut' naked Heffie. It was good. It was really, seriously great. You had a real moment, and you left yourself beautifully open to it. I'd be willing to bet most actors work their craft for years without ever finding even one moment like that.

[thehefner.livejournal.com]

Yeah, I'm still anxious to get out of the shadow of that performance. I feel like that's going to be the best thing I've done for years to come.

I can't wait to do that play again when I'm age appropriate. Cannot wait.

And thank you. That play proved to me that I *could* do it. But it has since proved harder than I thought it would be.

[lialife.livejournal.com]

Ach, I'm in the position to defend TST management - gak! But JZ and Serge really are different in the classroom than when you see them elsewhere. Just don't expect much outside of that little room, and you'll be fine. You're a cute boy, so Serge will be interested in you and you'll get a lot out of it. Carol is great, but still too green. Go for Serge.

[lialife.livejournal.com]

LOL... Mr. Cooper, I just saw that. Yes, in the office, very apt, I saw him leave people hanging when the JZ storm decended on the trailer park staff. Okay, enough LHC TST spam.

[thehefner.livejournal.com]

I'm so glad somebody besides spacechild (and cavenessity, I'd hope) understood what I meant there.

Yeah, I'm gonna try to go for Serge then. Righty right. Thankee!

[cavenessity.livejournal.com]

question: how much time total a week did you spend on this class including class time and scene work or rehearsal with your scene partner?

[thehefner.livejournal.com]

Each class, we spent about... a half hour, it might have been? More or less. We met once, maybe twice a week and rehearsed two-four hours per week. The scene itself was about five minutes long.