Speak 'What' again! Thou cur, cry 'What' again!

[thehefner]

Thanks to scarydavedc for finding this:

PULP FICTION, Shakespeare-style. A collaborative work in progress.

Vincent: And know'st thou what the French name cottage pie?
Julius: Say they not cottage pie, in their own tongue?
Vincent: But nay, their tongues, for speech and taste alike
Are strange to ours, with their own history:
Gaul knoweth not a cottage from a house.
Julius: What say they then, pray?
Vincent: Hachis Parmentier.
Julius: Hachis Parmentier! What name they cream?
Vincent: Cream is but cream, only they say la crème.
Julius: What do they name black pudding?
Vincent: I know not;
I visited no inn where't could be bought.

Dave's right, someone needs to do this at Fringe. Surely there must be a Rude bold enough. Just imagine the poster.

I think it's still incomplete, though. Maybe not. I don't think anybody's done Walken's monologue with the watch., Found it! C'mon, folks, I know some of you out there who are already thinking about their own takes (and perhaps improvements over what's already been written)...

Comments

On a related note:

[charisma18.livejournal.com]

Something I threw together a few years ago... I've long since forgotten most of it, but the beginning I remember:

STAR WARS, PART IV
Act V, Scene ii

[Alarum. Enter Antilles, Skywalker, and various other Pilots]

Antilles:
"Once more into the trench, Red Team, once more,
Lest Yavin be destroyed by our delay!
The Old Republic, peaceful, let us live
In common joy and love towards fellow men;
But since the Empire calls us now to war,
So imitate the actions of the wookie;
Let me hear snarling, arm yourselves as though
To tear the very arms of droids asunder.
This Star of Death is like the Emperor's Eye-
A daunting declaration to the foes
Of Palpatine: "Behold! His gaze can pierce
Its way into the very hearts of worlds!"
But switch your targeting computers on,
And let your S-foils blossom into 'X,'
That negatory cipher which declares
How we will tolerate this age no more."

I forget the rest, except for the end:

"I see you sit like drivers in their pods,
That strain upon the race's start. 'Tis now!
Recall for whom you fly and heed my call,
And may the Force be truly with you all!"

[Exeunt, pursued by Ties]

Re: On a related note:

[thehefner.livejournal.com]

Astounding.

The last stage direction is the geek cherry on the dork cake.

Re: On a related note:

[charisma18.livejournal.com]

Mmm.. dork cake... so greasy...