Traffic Court: The Next Day

[thehefner]

The day has passed.

I wrote up a mini-script of what I was going to say to the judge, but I hardly remember what I said, save for trying to explain (in some semi-coherent form) my mindset at the time. Namely, it was exams week, I was tired, stressed, and had just broken up with my girlfriend (which wasn't entirely true, but true enough). I don't know how much further I got before he told me to stop while I was ahead, and I shut up. Then he passed sentence and I sat down, and the words hadn't even sunk it. The bailiff handed me a sheet and whispered, genuinely amazed, "I don't know how the hell you did it. Anybody else would have been nailed, but you got off damn lucky."

Probation before judgement. No points. $275 fine reduced to $125.

Now... I know several of you will be smugly playing the "I told you so" card, but I know several others were pretty damn prepared for me to at least get SOME points. After all, I was going 97 MPH in a 65 zone. That's not slap-on-the-wrist territory anymore.

Mother. Fuck. I don't know how I did it, but I did it. I should be much happier, but I'm still a little nervous, for fear of jinxing it. So. Yay me.

As the wise man Willem Dafoe once said, "Kinda makes me feel like Riverdancin'."

Comments

[yancentric.livejournal.com]

nice, yo.

I thought it was a possibility, but a really small one. Well done.

...and glad I don't have to pay those court costs ;)...

[surrealname.livejournal.com]

makes me feel like sodomy

[jcsbimp.livejournal.com]

i. b. hap e. 4 u. d00d

[fiveseconddelay.livejournal.com]

Fortunately, you didn't blather on to the judge about how lucky you were the officer didn't open the trunk.
I better get back to work before your milk carton tropy list exceeds mine. Dude, collectibles go down in value when you swamp the market.

[thehefner.livejournal.com]

???
What the heck are you talking about? Sometimes, Alan old buddy, I suspect that whatever world you're in is somehow more wonderful and magical than mine.

[tazira.livejournal.com]

You know, 'milk carton trophies' as in the 'have you seen this child?' ads on the sides of milk cartons. Shit, I thought I was alone in collecting those. Jaki's Kids go to a child slave labor farm in Trinidad. The carton collection goes on the wall of a rough bar called "Tony's Place" in Syosset, Long Island.

[tazira.livejournal.com]

And congrats on the ticket and the points. Big sigh of relief. Next time, I too will know to tell the sob story. Honesty proved expensive in my case. ;-P

Depends...

[thirdbase.livejournal.com]

Depending on what kind of judge you get, don't ya think you might get dinged for "having just broken up with my girlfriend"? ;)
Don't go to court south of the Manson-Nixon Line...

Re: Depends...

[thehefner.livejournal.com]

Hey, it worked, didn't it?

[thehefner.livejournal.com]

Um, okay. But even still, what the heck do 'milk carton trophies' have to do with my court date? I'm ever so confused.

[tazira.livejournal.com]

I'd explain, but I'm too lazy. I'll leave it to Alan.

Re: Depends...

[thirdbase.livejournal.com]

Fo you, yes. My concern was Tazir'a desire to try your entire spiel...

Save it for the Judge...

[fiveseconddelay.livejournal.com]

...but I got some primo tattoos if you need them. I'm looking to trade for piercings. And this time I want them mint, no post-mortem productions, you cheating bastard!