wherein Heffie runs afoul of a Burt's Bees stand

So I'm going shopping at Rodman's, one of the most awesome stores ever (they carry all these awesome international items, including a very intriguing Russian malt cola type drink that looked as interesting as it did frightening) when I come upon the Burt's Bees stand of products.

Now, my skin has been really dry and crusty of late, and so when I saw the free sample tester can of moisturizing lotion, I figured, what the hell? But then I read the can, which said, "For best results, mix with Burt's Bees brand spritzing toner spray." And right next to the moisturizing lotions were the spritzer bottles, right there.

I raised an eyebrow. "Hmmm." I scooped out a small dollop of the cream and sprayed a bit of the grapefruit spray shit onto it, rubbed 'em together, and applied to my face. Hmm, that's kinda nice! My skin feels much better! Then I notice something at the bottom of the stand. Burt's Bees Hand Salve- "A farmer's best friend!" Free tester sample! Well... I suppose my hands are feeling a bit dry and chapped now that I think about it. Let's see how that feels. Oooh! That's also pretty good! Hmmm...

I spend the next five or so minutes, maybe ten, huddled by the Burt's Bees stand, keeping an eye out for Rodman's workers, as I give myself a free makeover with all the free products. Eye cream! Vanishing cream! Cuticle strengthener! Hey, what's this? Strawberry flavored lip gloss! ... After a few seconds serious contemplation, I decided not to opt for the lip gloss.

(Seriously, I wonder if there's ever been a story where someone just decides to hit up all the free samples of everything he can find, from food to moisturizers.)

I left the store feeling fresher, hydrated, and covered in all manner of rich new scents! I felt great! I got in my car to drive back, the thick scents of all the things I applied to my face and hands wafting heavily in the car. I drove along for a minute or two, taking in a few deep breaths, before I noticed, with some curiosity, that (hey, how 'bout that?) my throat seemed to be closing in on me.

No, there's no need for you to wallop me for my unabashed metrosexuality. I end up paying for it myself sooner or later.

hrmmm...

It's going to be very interesting to see how the X3 signing does tomorrow at our Georgetown comic store. On one hand, our store is teeny tiny and folks will be crammed in there like sardines; ideally, we'll have a line going around the block. That'd be great for our exposure since every week we get somebody coming in with a dumb awe-filled smile on their face, saying, "How long have you been here? Six years?! I never noticed you guys were here!"

On the other hand, it's at 2:30, when many people are at work and unable to come.

On the other other hand, it's Anna bloody Paquin. And three other guys.

We will see.

(no subject)

To anyone who was about to respond to a post I put up there for about five minutes, the problem has been solved, once again, thanks to google.

Instead, I will simply mention that my cat is trying to fight the neighborhood fox. I caught the two of them outside, circling each other.

My cat is a fucking moron.

That is all.