JOHN HUGHES REPORT

A couple days ago, NPR did an excellent piece of the legacy of SIXTEEN CANDLES' most infamous creation, Long Duk Dong. It's an illuminating and fascinating segment, and I'm especially glad they got Gedde Watanabe himself to comment (as if he was too busy filming VAMP 2: REVENGE OF GRACE JONES' HAIRPIECES).

Although if I ever met Gedde, I'd sooner probably quote UHF to his face. Which, upon consideration, is probably not much better, is it? "She'll take the box! What's in the box?! NOTHING. ABSOLUTELY NOTHING! STUPID! YOU SO STUPID!!!" Yeah, maybe not so much. I shall continue to watch and adore SIXTEEN CANDLES and UHF alone in my shame.

To accompany that, NPR posted on their website Adrian Tomine's "The Donger and Me," which I think sums up the situation rather nicely. On the other hand, come on, Adrian, that's what you get for watching BOOTY CALL in the first place.



Similarly, CHUD.com wrote a neat little opinion piece on John Hughes' cinematic absence, which reminded me how much I loved some of his films, much as I seethingly dislike teenage culture. Hell, I'm that guy who doesn't like DAZED AND CONFUSED nor FAST TIMES AT RIDGEMONT HIGH, but Hughes' films (that I've seen) have always charmed and delighted me.

Of course, I haven't seen THE BREAKFAST CLUB in five years, so who knows how it'll hold up; I'm tempted to still loathe them turning Ally Sheedy into a pod person; she was prettier before, damn it! Nor have I seen WEIRD SCIENCE, which I've heard if both excellent and a piece of shit.

Furthermore, much as I love FERRIS BUELLER'S DAY OFF, I think I hate Ferris himself. The smug kid has everything going for him, and breezes through the movie with ease. Even when there's conflict, it's so obvious that he's never in any real danger, save for at the very end when his sister saves his ass. Shit, sometimes I wish Rooney had nailed him! (Then again, as it's Jeffrey Jones, maybe not. Sorry, couldn't resist the cheap shot)

Also, I feel like he bullies Cameron under the pretense of helping him grow. I know big brothers who do that. It's very not cool. It's like, sure, he'd like Cameron to get out from under his father's thumb, that's all well and good, but he wants the CAR first and foremost!

But in either case, I think FERRIS BUELLER has already been forever ruined for me ever since I saw this:

Oh, and PLANES, TRAINS, AND AUTOMOBILES is still my Thanksgiving movie of choice.

Now can we finally get THE LUNCH CLUB made, where they attend their high school reunion?

I tried to stay away. Curse those rockin' tits.

Trey Parker and Matt Stone have put every SOUTH PARK episode on-line for free.

Twelve seasons and still going strong. This show should have fizzled out around season two, yet somehow, they actually got better and better. Whereas the five-times-more-popular FAMILY GUY quickly became a retread of itself, and THE SIMPSONS has but the rare excellent gem amid its current seasons of mediocrity, SOUTH PARK is still goddamn brilliant. I was starting to get concerned this season, though. The first two episodes had been kinda weak. But then this week's episode aired, and... oh sweet lord, we were dying over here.

So for those looking to catch up on SOUTH PARK, might I humbly suggest trying the following episodes...

Season 5: "Scott Tenorman Must Die"

Season 7: "Fat Butt and Pancake Head," AKA "Jennifer Lopez."

Season 8: "Good Times with Weapons," (if I were a monster, I'd suggest "Woodland Critter Christmas")

Season 10: "Make Love Not Warcraft."

There are so many others, but those just pop out at me as must-sees.

If you haven't seen this week's, "Major Boobage," a stellar homage of 1981's HEAVY METAL, oh dear lord do. It actually made me want to watch HEAVY METAL again, which is saying something. I think that film is one of the classic examples of "You had to be there."

Some of the best American satire being produced today. Even if it's not for all tastes (but then, what satire is?)