Story Meme

[thehefner]

Yoink, holli!

Give me the title of a story I haven't written, or a story you wish *someone* had, and I will tell you what happens in that story.

I reserve the right to be utterly stuck or utterly stink.

Comments

[disc-sophist.livejournal.com]

"Virtuitus Fortuna Comes"

[thehefner.livejournal.com]

Through circumstance, Bub and Johnny Go find themselves in London. While the zombie apocalypse in the US took the form of slow-moving zombies, in England it mutated into more of the 28-Days-Later infection, which means that while the zombies may be gone, the living infected are still running loose and are very much a threat. They find protection with the last surviving member of The Duke of Wellington's Regiment, who stole a suit of armor from the Tower of London to protect himself from the infected and has been living in the already-devestated Buckingham Palace, protecting it from any infected intruders.

Bub, Johnny, and the soldier fight zombies together and have merry adventures in the huge palace, maybe even encountering some Shaun of the Dead characters, before the big climactic ending where the soldier sacrifices himself (or just stays behind to fight the good fight) to get Bub and Johnny on a boat/plane/blimp back to the States so they can continue their quest to the holy land Las Vegas.

[disc-sophist.livejournal.com]

Bwee! That'll do, sir.

[thehefner.livejournal.com]

Of course, now I'm gonna have to write that one.

[gore-whore-5.livejournal.com]

Another Bullshit Night in Suck City (Nick Flynn)

[thehefner.livejournal.com]

Wait, who's Nick Flynn and why is his name in subtitles? Or is that all a part of the title?

[gore-whore-5.livejournal.com]

Nick Flynn is the author. You said a title of a story somebody else has written, and he wrote that. Or am I getting confused again?

[thehefner.livejournal.com]

No, no, a title of a story that doesn't exist, a story you wish that I had written or that *someone* had written. You give me this made-up title, and I try to make a story to go with it.

[gore-whore-5.livejournal.com]

Oooh. In that case, The Adventures of Sasquatch and Boy Girl

[thehefner.livejournal.com]

Boy Girl, a girl born with a penis, testicles, and no vagina, ovaries, or breasts, follows around and harasses Sasquatch, trying to get him/her/it to start a superhero team. "Sassy", as she/he/it calls him/her/it, just fucking wants to be left alone. Throw in some paparazzi, government agents, and a few unfortunate campers, and hilarity ensues.

[dormsquirrel.livejournal.com]

The Seduction of Hamster Girl

[thehefner.livejournal.com]

Hamster Girl is a socially awkward shy girl who moonlights (or at least tries to) as a superheroine with the power to communicate with hamsters. Dejected and alone because she feels like only the hamsters understand her, she becomes the target of a vile cad who sees a lot more power and potential in her hamster-communicating powers than she does. He plots to take advantage of the sensitve young Hamster Girl, seducing her with the plot to use her powers. Knowing that hamsters are naturally the most telekenetic animals in the world, he plots to get her to use the nation's hamsters to brainwash the schoolchildren of the world, either to hold them hostage or to make himself Emperor of America, he hasn't decided which.

Once the true nature of his plan is discovered, Hamster Girl defeats the bad guy with the help of a new superhero, Gerbil Lad, who it turns out was the nice boy who works at the local pet store who's been too shy to tell Hamster Girl that he's had a crush on her. They become the cuddliest yet still socially-awkward superhero duo ever.

[whimmydiddle.livejournal.com]

"The Rules to Mah-jongg."


Years ago I acquired a very nice mah-jongg set, but no rulebook came with it. I went to the library & tried to find the rules, but my efforts failed. So I went to the librarian and asked, "I'm looking for the rules to mah-jongg." She did some hunting through her files & after a while peered up at me over her glasses and asked, "Who is the author?"

Turns out she thought I was talking about the title of a novel: The Rules to Mah-jongg." After I corrected this impression, in the end, she couldn't find what I was looking for. But I walked away with this image in my head of a fantastic novel of mystery, intrigue, and romance, with hints of oriental culture laced into it, and in this novel the game of mah-jongg was used as an allegory for the complicated rules by which the characters interacted.

I couldn't write this novel. Maybe you can't either. But the imaginary novel in my head is a gripping page-turner. A guaranteed bestseller, but also very well-written. (Unlike many bestsellers.)

[thehefner.livejournal.com]

Damn, that is a good title. That, or "The Rules ofMah-jongg". I've been trying to think up a story for this one all day but have so far failed. All your ideas are exactly what've popped in my head when you said that, but to do it justice I would need to research Chinese culture and learn how to play the bloody game, for one thing. But I just might love to write this one.

[sharrainchains.livejournal.com]

The Greenridge Station Armadillo Day Treasure Hunt

[eliyes.livejournal.com]

I'm positive I've read that. O.O

[thehefner.livejournal.com]

That title is so magical, I really don't know if I can do it justice. Yet.

[eliyes.livejournal.com]

Hmmm.

How Johnny Go Got His Cool...or is that title taken?

That or The Ineffable Confidence Machine.

[thehefner.livejournal.com]

I think that'd have to be the Secret Origin of Johnny Go, which I'm still formulating. You'll get that story at some point, rest assured.

[eliyes.livejournal.com]

Dammit!

I Worked For NADS: true confessions of a former Ninja Assassin Death Squad leader.

you know which surfer.

[spacechild.livejournal.com]

Not Without My Guinness.. The Danny Conn Story.

and now, not being totally self-centered..

Kramer Vs. Surfer