Father's Day

[thehefner]

Do you have any idea how difficult it is shopping for a birthday card for your abusive alcoholic father?

Well I do.

I mean, most cards are crap anyway, all dripping with disgusting, artificial sentimentality or lame, unfunny, and therefore "family friendly" jokes. In fact, I really do feel like if you ever want to see everything that's wrong with american humor and taste sensibilities, just look at the greeting card shelf. I'm certain there's a clue there somewhere.

But back to the point. I mean, I look at some of these "Birthday for Dad" cards, like "Here's a spot to hold your beer!" but there's not really anything for the gin and tonic set. Or there's another card that says, "Thanks for always being there for me." Well, I suppose he was. It was actually less of him being there and more my being there with him, as he always has been extremely possessive and protective of me, wanting me to stay at his house for hours on end, even if we don't do anything together.

And then there's another card: "For a man who means so much to so many people, Happy Birthday from one of them." Well, except for the fact that he's alienated virtually everybody in his life, so I'm pretty much all he has left.

But in the end, I had to pick one, because he didn't want a present. For the last couple years, all he's ever wanted on Christmas and on his birthday would be just one thing. All he wanted was a card that said, "I love you, Dad." That's all.

We had a nice day together. We haven't watched a movie together in over a year, mainly since the only thing he really wants to watch anymore is the lightest and most straight-forward of comedies. So I rented a Muppet Show tape, guest-starring some favorites of ours, John Cleese, Peter Sellers, and Dudley Moore. And afterwards, I spent awhile telling him about my Bub and Johnny comic. It had occured to me that I hadn't told him anything about it yet or about Stacy. It was a good day.

He was already pouring another shot of gin into the stained crystal glass of tonic water when I gave him the card. He almost thought I had forgotten. When I left the house, there were tears in his eyes.

Comments

[whimmydiddle.livejournal.com]

I can sympathize. My father's been absent with mental illness since I was a toddler. Cards that thank him for all those years of mowing the lawn just don't cut it.

You did a good thing.

[deliapuppeh.livejournal.com]

I forget when father's day is, and I think my dad was in....some other state at least when it happened.

[tankgirl88.livejournal.com]

that was a beautiful entry

[thehefner.livejournal.com]

Thank you, dearie.