thehefner: (Harvey Birdman: Pirates Peanut!)
[personal profile] thehefner
Ever met someone completely devoid of a sense of humor? I thought I had too. Then I met my director for a one-act play I'm doing for Silver Spring Theatre's One-Act Festival.

Seriously. We've had three long rehearsals so far, and the man has not laughed or smiled once. Or maybe he has smiled, but there's no way of knowing with that Wilford Brimley Walrus mustache of his. And he says *everything* with the humorless imperativeness of a stage manager on Hell Week. Alan's right, he's not a director. He is... the Imperator!

Speaking of mustaches, he's having me try to grow a goatee. I told him it wouldn't happen. He said try anyway.

Weep. Weep for humanity.

(I just have this visual of Orlando Bloom coming up to me, pointing, and going, "HAW-HAW!")

Date: 2006-07-17 07:41 pm (UTC)
From: [identity profile] little-dinosaur.livejournal.com
I feel like he's less of a "HAW-HAW" guy than a sort of dainty "tee hee".

Date: 2006-07-17 07:46 pm (UTC)
From: [identity profile] thehefner.livejournal.com
God, you're right. I can't decide which would be the more humiliating. Well, I mean other than the sight of me with an attempted goatee.

Date: 2006-07-17 08:40 pm (UTC)
From: [identity profile] seangrimm.livejournal.com
:pokes you in the belly:
boop!

Date: 2006-07-17 08:53 pm (UTC)
From: [identity profile] thehefner.livejournal.com
What do I look like, the Pillsbury Doughboy/Jay Sherman/Molotov Cocktease?

Date: 2006-07-17 09:07 pm (UTC)
From: [identity profile] thehefner.livejournal.com
God, it's my future. Jay Sherman, the Comic Book Guy, they just amount to the same thing. God help me!

Date: 2006-07-17 09:19 pm (UTC)
From: [identity profile] kali921.livejournal.com
ICON LOVE.

AHAHAHAHAHAHHAHA.

Date: 2006-07-17 09:36 pm (UTC)
From: [identity profile] seangrimm.livejournal.com
the booping of cocktease made me laugh very loud-like, not like a proper little japanese geisha.

doc&jackson make me happy that we have some decent animation in america, even if its made in korea.

Date: 2006-07-17 09:04 pm (UTC)
From: [identity profile] kali921.livejournal.com
Declaratory Statement #471:

I hate facial hair on men, usually. I particularly loathe mustaches by themselves. No man can wear a mustache except for 1) Zorro and 2) Clark Gable and MAYBE 3) Bill the Butcher. Thus decreeth the goddess Shri Mahakali.

But a well-groomed goatee? Usually looks GREAT on a guy. Work it, baby!

Sounds like...

Date: 2006-07-17 09:43 pm (UTC)
From: [identity profile] slaversbane.livejournal.com
TM crossed with Snidley Whiplash. Ouch.

Just noting your current music, my roomate in college had a hell of a live version of Waiting for My Man that the VU did in NY. Back when Lou was still on coke and could pull a 3 hour show.

One of my favorite VU songs, along with Heroin, White Light White Heat, and Stephanie Says.

Anyway, may your director have a fit of passion and may your show kick nuts...hard.

Re: Sounds like...

Date: 2006-07-17 10:38 pm (UTC)
From: [identity profile] kali921.livejournal.com
Testify on the VU! Back when Lou still wore eyeshadow and was still shooting up backstage, before he got totally boring and grew a mullet.

A mullet, fer chrissakes.

Re: Sounds like...

Date: 2006-07-17 11:51 pm (UTC)
From: [identity profile] slaversbane.livejournal.com
The Mullet....oh the terrible mullet....
But there were days. Days when Lous voice would sound like it was raked over burning coals, and you could see his fingers bleeding and his veins cracking under the pressure on that gooseneck axe of his.
Back when Mo Tucker would flip a bass drum on its ass and bash the shit out of it with tympani mallets while sound and glory filled the room.
I bear witness!
Hell yes.
Amen.

Re: Sounds like...

Date: 2006-07-18 03:24 am (UTC)
From: [identity profile] kali921.livejournal.com
....I may have to friend you.

Re: Sounds like...

Date: 2006-07-18 05:34 pm (UTC)
From: [identity profile] slaversbane.livejournal.com
Please do, if I might return the favor?

Re: Sounds like...

Date: 2006-07-18 05:40 pm (UTC)
From: [identity profile] kali921.livejournal.com
But of course. An awesome person to talk good music and trashy glam with! *friends*

Re: Sounds like...

Date: 2006-07-18 06:19 pm (UTC)
From: [identity profile] slaversbane.livejournal.com
Fantastic. Tis done.

Friends!!!

Re: Sounds like...

Date: 2006-07-19 04:28 am (UTC)
From: [identity profile] kali921.livejournal.com
Let the resurrection of Lester Bangs commence!

RAWK!

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