I'm a-comin' for you, Gatorland!

[thehefner]

So.

Guess who's performing THE HEFNER MONOLOGUES in the 2008 Orlando Fringe Festival?

... the first five guesses don't count.

And thus the first stop on my North American tour is landed. Holy shit, this is happening.

Up next, time to apply for Cincinnati Fringe and Montreal Fringe. It downright terrifies me that it'll cost me $683.70 in Canadian money to apply for my 1 hour 15 minutes show, but as I get 100% of the box office, theoretically it should work out. Assuming I can fill enough houses.

Comments

[findingjuliet.livejournal.com]

i used to live in gainesville -- about 2 hours from Orlando and still have lots of theatre friends there -- i will definitely let them know about this. make sure to give me some flyers when you get them and i'll mail some to them :)

[thehefner.livejournal.com]

Oh, that'd be awesome, thank you! I haven't even fully considered the issue of plastering ads in the week or so before the actual show. That's gonna be a running theme with any show I apply for, I should keep in mind.

Once I know what shows I'm in, I'll do a full tour poster. That will be awesome, thank you so much in advance!

[little-dinosaur.livejournal.com]

Rockin'.

And, totally selfishly and not helpfully at all, cower before the kick-assness of the Canadian dollar! I kid, and you know I'll threaten and cajole at least a few of my fellow Canadians to help fill those seats.

[thehefner.livejournal.com]

Kick-assness? More like the ass-suckness of the American dollar. You only win by default!

Grand, because as one of the only two people I know in Montreal (and four Candians in general, unless I'm forgetting someone), I'm depending on you to spread the word of Hef! Because that is an assload of money and a hell of a drive!

DEPENDING. YOU. ON.

[little-dinosaur.livejournal.com]

You only win by default!
It's usually neater that way. We are a patient people.

But does with great responsibility come great power? Any interesting powers?

[thehefner.livejournal.com]

I'd say you have the power to utterly crush my heart into a thousand red, white, and blue pieces, but then, most women have that power anyway.

[torberg.livejournal.com]

De! Fault! The two greatest words in the English language.

[angrylemur.livejournal.com]

Don't hate us because your country's administration is flushing your economy down the toilet. (I mean, we're only doing marginally better, after all.)

Alas, I don't know anyone in Montreal, so I can't use my Canadianness to help you fill seats. I suspect that the people of Montreal are largely surly French Separatists. They did give us poutine, though.

[thehefner.livejournal.com]

Don't go be startin' no East Side West Side brawl on my LJ, yo.

[aeonata.livejournal.com]

This is incredible! I am so excited for you! Heffie on tour- You have really made this happen and you are still so young (I mean that in a good way, not condescesnding in the least). Go forth and conquer!

[thehefner.livejournal.com]

I am rather surprised that my youth is a remarkable factor. Even the Washington Post reviewer called me "young John Hefner." Huh!

I'll rape and pillage a small town just for you, my dear.

[bimmin.livejournal.com]

This is an awesome way to start the day! Even better than wheaties!!!

I will strive to bring my entire English grad class and my non-school chums on the grounds that it will help enrich their literary and artistic brains! Oooohh! I most definitely could get the Creative Writing faculty involved. *bounces around* WOOT!

AND a chance to meet Little Dinasaur! Woot indeed!

...Cats Canadian Invasion Sequence Commenced...

[thehefner.livejournal.com]

Fuck Wheaties. You have Heffies! Packed with ham, cheese, and corn!

Oh, that'd be awesome! I'd certainly feel better about plunking down a huge wad of slightly-more-worthless-than-yours cash!

[ortugatay.livejournal.com]

Yay!
That is indeed good news, and let me know if and when you need anything on our end, to keep track of your deadlines and the like.

(PS my goal is eventually to get you to the Edinburgh Fringe, though that is one hell of a pricey and complicated endeavor...)

[thehefner.livejournal.com]

Will do! Thankya!

Aye, I'm putting off Edinburgh this year, methinks. I've got to work my way up there. Orlando's the biggest Fringe fest in the US, so that's a good step up.

[leiacat.livejournal.com]

Travel safely, and break legs by the dozen. Hope to still hear from you on occasion when you're rich and (in)famous. :)

[thehefner.livejournal.com]

I don't imagine I'll ever be too far gone from this area. We'll see. :)

[cavenessity.livejournal.com]

You just rock :)

[thehefner.livejournal.com]

That means a lot, coming from you. Just yesterday, a few of us Rudes were reminiscing, and one of the topics that came up was how deeply and thoroughly you rock. So yay!

[testopolis.livejournal.com]

Congratulations!!!!!

=D

[thehefner.livejournal.com]

Thankya! :)

Guess who's performing THE HEFNER MONOLOGUES in the 2008 Orlando Fringe Festival?

[spacechild.livejournal.com]

Is it me?

It's not me, is it?

Because I am totally not prepared for this. I don't have anything memorized. I don't even have clean chonies.

Is it me?

Re: Guess who's performing THE HEFNER MONOLOGUES in the 2008 Orlando Fringe Festival?

[thehefner.livejournal.com]

Oh don't worry, you have several months ahead to HEY WAIT A MINUTE! NO!!!

Also, check out my very latest LJ entry when you have the chance. I just saw SWEENEY TODD, the 1982 version. I posted it from YouTube, and as a fan, I really want you to check it out. The entire thing is posted.

Re: Guess who's performing THE HEFNER MONOLOGUES in the 2008 Orlando Fringe Festival?

[spacechild.livejournal.com]

The whole thing is on youtube?

They support videos that large?

Going to check your lj...

Re: Guess who's performing THE HEFNER MONOLOGUES in the 2008 Orlando Fringe Festival?

[thehefner.livejournal.com]

It's broken up over several parts, but it's all there! For now, anyway...