You're so cool, Brewster!

[thehefner]

The news of FRIGHT NIGHT's remake doesn't offend me as much as, say, the thought of remarking Romero's MARTIN. It seems fairly inevitable, from the concept alone, not to mention that vampires are so hot right now.

Many people seem excited about the fact that BUFFY THE VAMPIRE SLAYER's Marti Noxon has written the remake. I know I'm prejudiced by the fact that I dislike Whedonese, but ugh. It's bad enough that we live in a post-BUFFY world of horror, but do we really have to take one of the greatest vampire movies of all time and redo it through a BUFFY filter? It doesn't need it.

What makes the original great was that it's a film for a post-Hammer generation, where Peter Cushing, Vincent Price, and TV horror hosts--representatives of classic horror--were already considered passe in the time of Freddy and Jason. It was a tribute to a genre that was pretty well loved exclusively by geeks, and it's even more of a niche today.

So I can grudgingly understand then recasting horror host Peter Vincent as a Criss Angel type showman, as that's more "relevant." And yeah, David Tennant, everybody loves David Tennant. I haven't watched DOCTOR WHO, and even I love David Tennant. But Peter Vincent not being a Hammer-style horror host just kind of hurts because of what it represents that we've lost in the horror genre and fans.

Also, he's Roddy Fucking McDowell. Not even the greatest Doctor can replace Jervis Cornelius Timmy (actually, his character in LASSIE COME HOME was named Joe, but whatever).

Now, Anton Yelchin as Brewster? Okay, that works. Colin Farrell as Jerry? A lot of people give Colin Farrell shit, but I've liked him since MINORITY REPORT, and he continues to be interesting in films like IMAGINARIUM OF DOCTOR PARNASSUS and IN BRUGES, so maybe he'll do well with the role. He's just not Chris Sarandon.

Normally, I loathe vampires*, but Jerry Dandridge's more a vampire in the Dracula mold. The key to being an awesome Dracula is that Dracula doesn't fucking angst. He swoops in, seduces ladies (and men; tell me that scene with Evil Ed isn't a seduction), and just generally gets to be awesomely, stylishly evil. Dandridge has that, while still being able to come off as a very ordinary guy. I still love the way he sells, "Velcome to Frrrright Night!... For real." Whatever Farrell will bring to the role, he won't have that quality, I bet.

Then, there's Evil Ed. When we heard that Christopher Mintz-Plasse was cast, Henchgirl and I both went, "Oh fuck, that's brilliant." Red Mist was the only thing about KICK-ASS that I actively loved (I'll give it another chance in a theater without douchebags), and we thought it was casting genius.
CHUD's Devin Faraci hugely disagrees for reasons that further remind me why the original FRIGHT NIGHT was great:

Stephen Geoffreys didn't play Evil Ed as just another geek; there's something weirder and darker and maybe more pervy to him. And that's not taking his gay porn future into account; I think that there's a connection between Evil Ed and the chronic masturbator that Geoffreys played in the underseen classic Heaven Help Us (also a 1985 film, like Fright Night). Geoffreys brings the same sweaty, twisted sexuality to Evil Ed.

Mintz-Plasse doesn't have that. There's no danger to him; even at the end of Kick-Ass he's sort of goofy. What made Evil Ed an iconic character is that he didn't conform to standard nerd tropes, and that he's edgier and more manic than what has become the nerd stereotype these days. His casting in this film makes me think they're leaning more towards making Evil Ed harmless (and that's only aided by the PG-13 they're going for), while the original Evil Ed felt like maybe getting bit by Jerry was the greatest thing that ever happened to him. And not just because it was a nerd power fantasy but because it allowed him to open up something darker inside of himself.

Again, maybe I'm wrong. Maybe writer Marti Noxon has a firm grasp on Evil Ed. It's just hard to see one of the more unique characters in horror history getting on the path for what is essentially gentrification - they're softening him up to make him more lovable to the norms.

... he's right. He's absolutely right. That's what made Evil Ed stand apart from a horror movies version of Anthony Michael Hall in THE BREAKFAST CLUB or Ducky.

But maybe Marti Noxon--someone I'm unfairly judging based on a series for which she wrote, not her actual abilities--has a great story up her sleeve. Maybe it will actually bring something new and interesting up her sleeve, and the cast will knock it out of the park. Maybe they'll even use McLovin to play up the subversiveness of Evil Ed as a "nerd" character. Maybe they'll pull it off.

Oh wait. It'll be PG-13?

Yeah, fuck the FRIGHT NIGHT remake.

Comments

[surrealname.livejournal.com]

I want to say something about how dark being a Ducky is, but I'm 25 years old, and have long since lost virginity and self doubt in the dust to become a lady's man of sorts. Fuck it.

I always liked Ed's pervy edge. I think the mclovin kid can play that, but it won't be the same. It'll just be kind of pathetic.

[jackolantern.livejournal.com]

I completely got diverted by Stephen Geoffreys' IMDB page (http://www.imdb.com/name/nm0313267/); he wasn't even in porn for that long, relatively speaking, but the rate at which porn actors crank them out (so to speak, hurr hurr) means that things like Butt Blazer and Leather Intrusion Case 4: Down to the Wire tend to dominate his record. Although I shouldn't be that shocked; I saw Heaven Help Us and Faraci isn't exaggerating, really--there's a scene in which Geoffreys' character, an altar boy and compulsive masturbator, is assisting with Communion, and after one Catholic schoolgirl after another comes up to the Communion rail (this is pre-Vatican II), kneels in front of him, and opens her mouth to receive the Body of Christ on her tongue... he faints dead away. Great stuff.

[kmousie.livejournal.com]

A lot of people give Colin Farrell shit, but I've liked him since MINORITY REPORT

Just wanted to say I totally agree with this. :-)

my two geek cents

[plasticity.livejournal.com]

I don't know most of the other references here, but I can say that as a longtime watcher of Buffy back in high school, Marti Noxon's stories were always the most cliched and hackneyed of the group of writers on the show. I violently disagreed with her take on the character of Willow, as well.

Re: my two geek cents

[thehefner.livejournal.com]

[tompurdue.livejournal.com]

Noxon was not a great writer for Buffy, and the show was not as good (in Buffy-fan terms) after Whedon turned it over to her. Her work on other shows has not thrilled me, either.

I don't know why I didn't just use this gif in the first place

[thehefner.livejournal.com]

[box-in-the-box.livejournal.com]

David Tennant playing a Roddy McDowall role? Fuck yes. I actually started imagining Tennant with artificially grayed hair and the Sherlock Holmes tweed cloak that Peter Vincent wore ...

recasting horror host Peter Vincent as a Criss Angel type showman

... And then, this shit fucking lost me.

Here's the problem: As you yourself correctly point out, THE ENTIRE POINT of the original Fright Night was that it was both a tribute to and a subversion of the already slowly dying tropes of the Hammer horror films, back during a decade when a new not-quite-fully-formed paradigm was starting to emerge.

But now? The opposite number of the "classic" vampire, that was just starting to appear in the '80s, IS the dominant paradigm. In a sense, it's part of what's killed Watchmen, because in the quarter-century since every single superhero comic on the stands has done SOMETHING to make itself more like Watchmen, the original itself has lost a lot of its resonance. As much shit as Zack Snyder took for his movie version, it actually could have been much worse, because he could have tried to do exactly what this remake seems poised to do - IE. "modernizing" the content of the original work to the point that its point is lost.

[thehefner.livejournal.com]

The two comments about Noxon just pretty well guaranteed that no one's even going to try to fail at giving this remake's existence a point.

[box-in-the-box.livejournal.com]

Which is a goddamned shame, because once again, I would pay money just to see David Tennant doing a Roddy McDowall impression.

I would still smile, though, if William Ragsdale was cast as Anton Yelchin's dad. And then, Yelchin could star in Chekov's Head.

[box-in-the-box.livejournal.com]

And I note that you politely ignored my comments in the Henchgirl post. :)

[thehefner.livejournal.com]

Oh, but I haven't! I just haven't quite figured out how to respond! What with her lack of a sister, and her mother being A.) insane and B.) dead.

[box-in-the-box.livejournal.com]

AH! IN THAT CASE, HOW AWKWARD! HAHAHAHAHAHAHA!

[thehefner.livejournal.com]

I've wasted the past fifteen minutes trying to find any video of Jay Sherman going "Hah-haaaaaaaa, how awkward." Ah well. His student film it is, then!



To this day, whenever I see a particularly pretentious art film, I always think, "Darling, I have always loved, oh no, Pro-mo-thee-us." "ProMEtheus!" FIN.

[box-in-the-box.livejournal.com]

Actually, I was imitating Coyote in Gunnerkrigg Court. :)

[thehefner.livejournal.com]

I love that fucking coyote.

[lillbet.livejournal.com]

1.) DAVID TENNANT? OH FUCK YES PLEASE.

2.) I cannot WAIT to see what Christopher Mintz-Plasse does with this role. He's a largely untested actor- hell, wasn't Superbad his first movie? And he's not some overtrained monkey boy type. If Noxon really lets her freak flag fly with Evil Ed, this could be AWESOME.

On the other hand, I thought SATC2 was a nice bit of senseless braincandy, so what the fuck do I know? It's gonna suck, here comes the Apocalypse. If you need me, I'll be in the fetal position over in this corner. Peace out.

[thehefner.livejournal.com]

As Box said above, it'd be one thing if it were Tennant doing more of the Peter Cushing thing. But as Criss Angel? No. No no no. No.

Have you seen the original, per chance?

On the other hand, I thought SATC2 was a nice bit of senseless braincandy

You're history's greatest monster. But I still like you. :)

[lillbet.livejournal.com]

Have you seen the original, per chance?

You mean the 1985 version? It was my first movie date and I still own it on VHS (have part two as well- William Ragsdale was my first crush). Why do you ask?

Meh. I'm thinking that to 90% of the target demo this movie is aimed at (ie teen boys, and girls who like Anton Yelchin) Criss Angel is probably way more creepy- in fact, I smell an Oscar for Tenninch if he pulls this off. Don't look at me like that, if Heath can do it with the Joker... Vampires are sexy again, that's why we're getting Colin Farrell and Yelchin and Tenninch. This movie? SO NOT FOR YOU, HEFFIE. Just save yourself lots of angst and ignore it. Step 1: fingers in ears. Step 2: sing LALALALLA! at the top of your lungs until it all goes away.

In re: SATC2. Yeah, I'm the real evil Sinead was talking about. FEAR ME.

[lillbet.livejournal.com]

AHAHAHAHAHAHA! I just reread this and I AM SUCH A BAD FANGIRL. I should be flogged!

Someday they will remake "Shaun of the Dead" and then? Then I shall be very very ANGRY.