Fuck PUNCH-DRUNK LOVE. Fuck it up its stupid ass.

[thehefner]

(Note: this is not meant to offend anyone who actually enjoyed the movie. I'm not out to get you, don't worry)

In 1935, Antonin Artaud founded the "Theatre of Cruelty." The techniques employed in Artaud's theatre included a giant screeching wheel that made deafening noise, "shredded" light, and seemingly random movements and shouting from the actors. The idea behind it was to create an experience so horrible and jarring so that it would shock the metaphorical demons out of the audience and purify them. It's an important movement, but one that, for some reason, did not last very long.



I just saw this piece of shit on Showtime and I can barely even begin to describe my utter hatred for this garbage. Where to start? For one thing, this was one of the singularly most pretentious films I've ever seen Anybody remember that scene in "The Critic" where we get to see Jay Sherman's old film school movie? The one where he sat inside a miniature train set and cried "WHY? WHY? WHY?" then it cut to a bunch of stock footage of bad stuff happening with choral music, and finally ended with a shot of his legs dangling as if he hung himself, and a woman in a bridal gown enters and says, dully, "Darling, I have always loved... oh no, Promotheus." And Jay whispers. "Prometheus!" And then the film says "Fin." This movie is film school pretentious at the very least.

I mean, check out the beginning, huh? Ooh! It's a midget harpsichord! How about we drop it off and never explain how it gets there! Gee, maybe it's symbolic of something! That's really cool and artsy! Oh, hey, let's have Sandler back up every time he gets nervous. Or tired. Or just when we feel like it! Brilliant! Oh, instead of titles, we're going to show a bunch of swirling colors that make absolutely no sense! Amazing! Hey, let's turn of the steady cam and see what happens. Things get shakey! How innovative!!!

Then after the blonde guy hits him and Sandler starts running, it becomes this Hitchcock thing. There are few thing more pretentious for a filmmaker to do than trying to imitate Hitchcock. Brian De Palma tried it in the 80's, buddy, and he STILL sucks ass! On then, oh, they kiss, let's make fun of romantic comedies with super-sweeping love music, how witty! Oh, look, let's have them kiss in silhouette with the beach in the background. Hey, know what'd be great? If while they kissed we can have a whole bunch of people pass them by. Never mind that just before that shot when Sandler and Watson are walking down that hallway to meet the halls are completely fucking empty, no one's going to notice! Fuck you. Don't fucking insult my intelligence you piece of shit hack.

And that's the thing that blows my mind. P.T. Anderson is not a hack. He made BOOGIE NIGHTS, a great movie. He made MAGNOLIA, which was a good, if not interesting, movie. This... this is like a retarded monkey in a screenwriting seminar made this billshit.

I will say this. Sandler showed he was capable to doing good work. Here's hoping when he gets his big shot in Tarantino's upcoming war movie INGLORIOUS BASTARDS he won't blow it. He proved he could be restrained here. And Emily Watson is as cute as a button. I think they invented the phrase "cute as a button" just for her. Or they should have. Because she really is.

But this movie, when it wasn't being a work of total hackery, was the most singularly uncomfortable film I've ever seen. More than MEET THE FEEBLES. More than SID AND NANCY. This was a hateful, smirking film that left me in this bitter ass angry mood right now. There are few movies that have invoked such ire. Lars von Tier's dogme movie MIFUNE was one. The remake of TEXAS CHAINSAW MASSACRE was another. Now we can add this pile of dogshit onto it.

Tomorrow, I may come back to this and see a comment or two that will leave me humbled and take all the wind out of my sails, then I will do what I usually do, feel embarassed, feel like an ass, and then prompty delete this comment and go back to keeping such passions to myself because I don't want to express an unpopular view. But right now I'm just too fucking pissed off to care.

I hate this movie more than Roger Ebert hated NORTH. More than Dave hated THE PASSION OF THE CHRIST. More than Doom hates Richards. Fuck PUNCH-DRUNK LOVE up its stupid ass.

Comments

[2sick2pray.livejournal.com]

AMEN. What a steaming pile of crap that movie was...

[dame-ratcliffe.livejournal.com]

I hated it too. Couldn't figure out why everyone was making such a big todo about it when it was in theatres. It was idiotic.

[tompurdue.livejournal.com]

Funny, I would have said that Magnolia was an interesting movie but not a good movie.

But I totally, totally agree with you on Punch-Drunk Love. 80% of the critics on Rotten Tomatoes liked it, and I'd really love to see what they'd think of it if they saw it again. I'm used to critics parroting each other, but Roger Ebert is usually a fairly independent thinker. He gave it 3-1/2 stars. His review is actually quite insightful, but I still disagree wildly.

And to think I walked out of Santa Clause 2 to see it.

[thehefner.livejournal.com]

I actually meant to say "interesting, if not good." And yeah, I'd heard raves about this film, so imagine my surprise. Glad to know I'm not alone.

[tompurdue.livejournal.com]

I had sort of an odd experience with Magnolia. My DVD player was acting up and reporting that the movie was much longer than it was. I had started it very late, so I went to bed when almost exactly at the point very near the end where it got weird. As you know the story doesn't really finish, it just stops, as if the director said, "Well, that's enough quirky performances for one day."

Turning it on the following day to finish it, and discovering myself in a totally different movie, was rather odd.

I'd say I quite enjoyed Magnolia. Many of the performances were fascinating.

Roger Ebert's review of Punch-Drunk Love suggests that it really is an Adam Sandler movie if it were directed by a much better director: the core of his characters is still there. I'm not enough of an Adam Sandler fan to see it. I'm not sure I've ever seen one of his films, but I feel as if I know them intimately just from the commericals, and have never seen any particular reason to see one. Sometimes trailers can be very misleading, but I don't think so in this case; I'm sure the audiences get exactly what they wanted.

So I can't tell if what Ebert said is right or wrong, but I'm even if it's true I'm not certain that I'd _want_ to see the best possible Adam Sandler movie.

[irish-caffeine.livejournal.com]

Thank you for posting this. After the agonizing experience that was Magnolia, I vowed to never waste another moment of my life on one of Anderson's films. I am fairly indifferent to Boogie Nights, but the moments immedietely following Magnolia were the only ones I can remember in which I felt that I had literally been robbed of four hours. Still, I'd heard so many rave reviews of Punch-Drunk that I was a little bit worried that I might be missing out on something. I'm glad to see that I'm not. Bash on, John.

[tompurdue.livejournal.com]

That's the thing: I liked Boogie Nights and I liked Magnolia, and I still hated Punch-Drunk Love.

If you hated the first two then definitely save yourself the trouble of seeing anything else of his. I'm never the kind of fanboy who tries to convince other people that they're wrong for disliking something I like.

[777666.livejournal.com]

I have no idea what movie you are talking about, but I will stay away from it in my future!

[findingjuliet.livejournal.com]

well here come the dissenters...roddy and i really liked it. in fact, we own it. so if anyone would like to come over and remember why they hate it so much, just give us a call ;)

[fishymcb.livejournal.com]

Here I am, John, come to bestow my cinematic ignorance upon you and all that you hold dear. Haha. ;) Which is my way of saying that I have not seen Boogie Nights. Nor have I seen Magnolia. Ditto Punch Drunk Love. But I have seen Spanglish, and I wanted to say that there is indeed hope for Adam Sandler as an actor. He was earnest and endearing, and yes, even restrained at times. He still does the "yelling at a moment's notice" schtick when he's angry, but I don't mind. The important thing is that the movie was not ABOUT Adam Sandler, or even about Adam Sandler and Paz Vega Loving Each Other, as the trailers may mislead you to believe. It's actually about Paz Vega (the housekeeper), her relationship with her daughter, and the impact of the waspish, materialistic American mindset on both of them. It's not an Adam Sandler Star Vehicle, thank goodness. Also, Cloris Leachman rocks my socks in this movie. So I recommend it. I promise to stop randomly capitalizing words, also. End communication.

[wendywoowho.livejournal.com]

A-fucking-men. Hate. HATE.

(and love Boogie Nights, and Magnolia)