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thehefner(Note: this is not meant to offend anyone who actually enjoyed the movie. I'm not out to get you, don't worry)
In 1935, Antonin Artaud founded the "Theatre of Cruelty." The techniques employed in Artaud's theatre included a giant screeching wheel that made deafening noise, "shredded" light, and seemingly random movements and shouting from the actors. The idea behind it was to create an experience so horrible and jarring so that it would shock the metaphorical demons out of the audience and purify them. It's an important movement, but one that, for some reason, did not last very long.
I just saw this piece of shit on Showtime and I can barely even begin to describe my utter hatred for this garbage. Where to start? For one thing, this was one of the singularly most pretentious films I've ever seen Anybody remember that scene in "The Critic" where we get to see Jay Sherman's old film school movie? The one where he sat inside a miniature train set and cried "WHY? WHY? WHY?" then it cut to a bunch of stock footage of bad stuff happening with choral music, and finally ended with a shot of his legs dangling as if he hung himself, and a woman in a bridal gown enters and says, dully, "Darling, I have always loved... oh no, Promotheus." And Jay whispers. "Prometheus!" And then the film says "Fin." This movie is film school pretentious at the very least.
I mean, check out the beginning, huh? Ooh! It's a midget harpsichord! How about we drop it off and never explain how it gets there! Gee, maybe it's symbolic of something! That's really cool and artsy! Oh, hey, let's have Sandler back up every time he gets nervous. Or tired. Or just when we feel like it! Brilliant! Oh, instead of titles, we're going to show a bunch of swirling colors that make absolutely no sense! Amazing! Hey, let's turn of the steady cam and see what happens. Things get shakey! How innovative!!!
Then after the blonde guy hits him and Sandler starts running, it becomes this Hitchcock thing. There are few thing more pretentious for a filmmaker to do than trying to imitate Hitchcock. Brian De Palma tried it in the 80's, buddy, and he STILL sucks ass! On then, oh, they kiss, let's make fun of romantic comedies with super-sweeping love music, how witty! Oh, look, let's have them kiss in silhouette with the beach in the background. Hey, know what'd be great? If while they kissed we can have a whole bunch of people pass them by. Never mind that just before that shot when Sandler and Watson are walking down that hallway to meet the halls are completely fucking empty, no one's going to notice! Fuck you. Don't fucking insult my intelligence you piece of shit hack.
And that's the thing that blows my mind. P.T. Anderson is not a hack. He made BOOGIE NIGHTS, a great movie. He made MAGNOLIA, which was a good, if not interesting, movie. This... this is like a retarded monkey in a screenwriting seminar made this billshit.
I will say this. Sandler showed he was capable to doing good work. Here's hoping when he gets his big shot in Tarantino's upcoming war movie INGLORIOUS BASTARDS he won't blow it. He proved he could be restrained here. And Emily Watson is as cute as a button. I think they invented the phrase "cute as a button" just for her. Or they should have. Because she really is.
But this movie, when it wasn't being a work of total hackery, was the most singularly uncomfortable film I've ever seen. More than MEET THE FEEBLES. More than SID AND NANCY. This was a hateful, smirking film that left me in this bitter ass angry mood right now. There are few movies that have invoked such ire. Lars von Tier's dogme movie MIFUNE was one. The remake of TEXAS CHAINSAW MASSACRE was another. Now we can add this pile of dogshit onto it.
Tomorrow, I may come back to this and see a comment or two that will leave me humbled and take all the wind out of my sails, then I will do what I usually do, feel embarassed, feel like an ass, and then prompty delete this comment and go back to keeping such passions to myself because I don't want to express an unpopular view. But right now I'm just too fucking pissed off to care.
I hate this movie more than Roger Ebert hated NORTH. More than Dave hated THE PASSION OF THE CHRIST. More than Doom hates Richards. Fuck PUNCH-DRUNK LOVE up its stupid ass.
In 1935, Antonin Artaud founded the "Theatre of Cruelty." The techniques employed in Artaud's theatre included a giant screeching wheel that made deafening noise, "shredded" light, and seemingly random movements and shouting from the actors. The idea behind it was to create an experience so horrible and jarring so that it would shock the metaphorical demons out of the audience and purify them. It's an important movement, but one that, for some reason, did not last very long.
I just saw this piece of shit on Showtime and I can barely even begin to describe my utter hatred for this garbage. Where to start? For one thing, this was one of the singularly most pretentious films I've ever seen Anybody remember that scene in "The Critic" where we get to see Jay Sherman's old film school movie? The one where he sat inside a miniature train set and cried "WHY? WHY? WHY?" then it cut to a bunch of stock footage of bad stuff happening with choral music, and finally ended with a shot of his legs dangling as if he hung himself, and a woman in a bridal gown enters and says, dully, "Darling, I have always loved... oh no, Promotheus." And Jay whispers. "Prometheus!" And then the film says "Fin." This movie is film school pretentious at the very least.
I mean, check out the beginning, huh? Ooh! It's a midget harpsichord! How about we drop it off and never explain how it gets there! Gee, maybe it's symbolic of something! That's really cool and artsy! Oh, hey, let's have Sandler back up every time he gets nervous. Or tired. Or just when we feel like it! Brilliant! Oh, instead of titles, we're going to show a bunch of swirling colors that make absolutely no sense! Amazing! Hey, let's turn of the steady cam and see what happens. Things get shakey! How innovative!!!
Then after the blonde guy hits him and Sandler starts running, it becomes this Hitchcock thing. There are few thing more pretentious for a filmmaker to do than trying to imitate Hitchcock. Brian De Palma tried it in the 80's, buddy, and he STILL sucks ass! On then, oh, they kiss, let's make fun of romantic comedies with super-sweeping love music, how witty! Oh, look, let's have them kiss in silhouette with the beach in the background. Hey, know what'd be great? If while they kissed we can have a whole bunch of people pass them by. Never mind that just before that shot when Sandler and Watson are walking down that hallway to meet the halls are completely fucking empty, no one's going to notice! Fuck you. Don't fucking insult my intelligence you piece of shit hack.
And that's the thing that blows my mind. P.T. Anderson is not a hack. He made BOOGIE NIGHTS, a great movie. He made MAGNOLIA, which was a good, if not interesting, movie. This... this is like a retarded monkey in a screenwriting seminar made this billshit.
I will say this. Sandler showed he was capable to doing good work. Here's hoping when he gets his big shot in Tarantino's upcoming war movie INGLORIOUS BASTARDS he won't blow it. He proved he could be restrained here. And Emily Watson is as cute as a button. I think they invented the phrase "cute as a button" just for her. Or they should have. Because she really is.
But this movie, when it wasn't being a work of total hackery, was the most singularly uncomfortable film I've ever seen. More than MEET THE FEEBLES. More than SID AND NANCY. This was a hateful, smirking film that left me in this bitter ass angry mood right now. There are few movies that have invoked such ire. Lars von Tier's dogme movie MIFUNE was one. The remake of TEXAS CHAINSAW MASSACRE was another. Now we can add this pile of dogshit onto it.
Tomorrow, I may come back to this and see a comment or two that will leave me humbled and take all the wind out of my sails, then I will do what I usually do, feel embarassed, feel like an ass, and then prompty delete this comment and go back to keeping such passions to myself because I don't want to express an unpopular view. But right now I'm just too fucking pissed off to care.
I hate this movie more than Roger Ebert hated NORTH. More than Dave hated THE PASSION OF THE CHRIST. More than Doom hates Richards. Fuck PUNCH-DRUNK LOVE up its stupid ass.
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Date: 2005-01-07 09:41 pm (UTC)If you hated the first two then definitely save yourself the trouble of seeing anything else of his. I'm never the kind of fanboy who tries to convince other people that they're wrong for disliking something I like.