Misc. Thoughts: Damn Dirty Hippie Edition

1.)In an almost nightly ritual, my hallway is filled with the smell of burning incense. Not just any incense either, the kind that screams, "hey, betcha can't guess what I'm thinly pretending to cover up!" Damn hippies.

2.) I've got a French II exam to fail tomorrow. God help me. I just wanna get through with a C. I can live with a D, but a C would be less humiliating. It doesn't matter, I don't need to maintain my GPA for scholarship since this is my last semester. So ha. (Oh God, I'm so stressed out... I suck at languages so much)

3.) Caffeine withdrawal sucks even more when you *just* get over it, then drink a really insanely strong energy drink that gives you a buzz for over fifteen hours before sending you into a spiraling crash. Ow. My brain feels like it wants to eat its way out of my skull.

4.) For those who don't already know, my roommate is the Saaaadest Hippie in the Whoooooooole World. He sleeps roughly seventeen hours of the day, during various hours of the day. I've had cats who sleep less than my pet hippie. I walked in today and he was on his back, his sheet draped over his entire body, like some shroud of hippie turin. At least he shaved off his dreadlocks. Yeah, imagine if *I* tried to grow dreadlocks. That's how these looked. Poor schmuck.

5.) Comin' down to see COE with Misty, Dave, and whoever else I can talk into carpoolin' with me! From there, to the cast party, and then Ma's house! Huzzah!

6.) Death Wish 3 was on AMC. And Charles Bronson has killed everybody. It's hypnotic, it really is.

fuck fuck fuck fuck fuck

A friend... a little higher than acquaintence type of friend... asked me out to Birthday Ball. I initally turned her down, because Cherry Orchard was scheduled to go up that weekened, great planning eh, and obviously I couldn't make it. Well, then I found out that they rescheduled Cherry Orchard to the weekend after, so I could make it after all, and I took her up on the offer.

Just around the very same time last week, Misty and I finally agreed to do this relationship thing, and huzzah I have my first girlfriend yadda yadda yadda. Well, I was speaking with this (B-Ball) girl's roommate and best friend, and I asked her if she knew about Misty and I, and roommate said I should probably tell her, and I can't remember if roommate girl offered to tell her or if I asked... I think she offered, but damn my memory... but regardless, she did. And B-Ball girl came up here to tell me, in a marvelously passive agressive, polite way that's so much worse than outright anger, that she wouldn't want to go to B-Ball with someone who didn't respect her enough to tell her such an item (that I was involved with somebody else) to her face.

Shit. Shit. Fuck. Shit.

I just... gahh, Lord knows I wasn't intending to be the jerk or anything, but I did... I do like this girl as a friend. She's a neat person! She's interesting! She's layered! And... if there's anything that cuts me, it's when I hurt someone, especially someone I like. I don't do it as often as I think I do, but when it happens, God, I fucking hate myself for it.

She said I could still go on my own, but what's the point? Misty's already got a date (remember, I didn't think I could go) and besides, I wasn't relishing going to Birthday Ball anyway, what with the memories of my first and only Ball.

Shit, man. I fucking *hate* times like this.