Remaining HEFNER MONOLOGUES tour info! Indianapolis and Vancouver!

Some people have been asking if I'm done with my 2009 tour just yet. Oh no, not quite. Not by a long shot. THE HEFNER MONOLOGUES is performing at two more festivals in the next month! Can YOU make it to either one?



First, at IndyFringe, the Indianapolis Fringe Festival!

Friday, August 21, 2009, 10:30 pm
Sunday, August 23, 2009, 4:30 pm
Tuesday, August 25, 2009, 7:30 pm
Thursday, August 27, 2009, 9:00 pm
Saturday, August 29, 2009, 1:30 pm
Sunday, August 30, 2009, 9:00 pm

@ the Phoenix Theatre (click for directions!)



And then I'll be flying out for my final Canadian gig, and final Fringe of the year: the Vancouver Fringe Festival!!!

Sep 10 - 7:00 PM
Sep 12 - 9:00 PM
Sep 13 - 3:15 PM
Sep 13 - 9:00 PM
Sep 14 - 7:15 PM
Sep 16 - 7:15 PM
Sep 19 - 9:00 PM
Sep 20 - 3:20 PM

@ Origins Organic Coffee Co. (click for directions... once the Fringe folks see fit to actually post them at this link!)




I plan to get back around early October, and shortly thereafter, I plan to throw a massive "Holy crap, I'm back and I'm TIRED" party! I was thinking of having it be a Halloween party (how often does Halloween happen on a Saturday night?!), but Dethklok are playing at the Patriot Center. I'd be a fool to miss a Halloween concert with Dethklok, especially with themadhatter26 by my side. Of course, if I can't get tickets, then I'll drown my sorrows with all of you, in costume. Either way, it'll be brutal. In the nicest way possible.

So yeah, take note. Party sometime in October, at the Heffiedome. Assuming the Heffie survives. He barely made it out of Winnipeg. No, really. I really should post that story here just so I don't have to keep telling it to everyone who wonders why I've been using a snazzy cane recently to help with my wanged-out back. I just haven't sucked up the nerve to emasculate myself in front of you en masse with this one yet. And this is me I'm talking about: the guy who regularly punches myself in the balls for your amusement!

Crap, I'm just hyping it up now, aren't I? Maybe I'll need the webcam to properly illustrate this. Later.

My Beach House. Anyone want to rent it for a bit? It's totally boss, & Heffie needs money.

So, hey, I dunno how many of you folks know this, but I have a beach house on Rehoboth Beach. I mean, Mom runs the operation, but I own it. Seriously. I am a legit homeowner now.

This was how we invested my inheritance from Dad. To say I was hesitant about Mom's wacky idea is putting it lightly, but my brother and stepfather agreed it was a good idea, which says a lot if they all thought so.

Turned out, this house is one of the best things that ever happened to me. For one thing, it's a perfect writer's retreat, just inland enough to be close to everything but to be surrounded with privacy and nature. I'd likely be spending whole weeks up here at a time, just hermiting it up and writing and resting, if I didn't have Fringe Festivals to do. Not to mention renters.

That was Mom's other big idea for the house. A little income for the jobless traveling artist. And until I become experienced and established enough at Fringe Festivals, this house is now my primary source of income. Which is why Mom has been telling me how I've needed to post this very entry here on LJ for weeks now, so I could put the offer out there for all of you.

We want to keep the beach house rentals to the people we know, and the people they know, rather than just put it up on Craigslist and the like. So yeah, if you'd like a vacation spot a couple miles outside of downtown Rehoboth Beach, or a writer's retreat of your own, or just a place for a little peace and quiet, drop me a line.

It's $600 for a week, and we really prefer doing it as week-long rentals, but we can do weekends for around $400, open for negotiation. And hey, we still have Labor Day open!




And hey, since we're already talking about renting homes, my good pal tragical_mirth is back in the DC area and looking for a place! Anyone have any good leads? She's willing to share the awesome power of her Netflix account with roomies!

Geekgasm double-feature! TRON sequel trailer! And something GI JOE-related that defies description!

Back to general nerdiness.

First, I should mention that I finally watched TRON last Friday for the express purpose of being able to watch the much-hyped trailer for TRON LEGACY, and holy sweet bejabbers, you folks weren't kidding. That is one sweet trailer. And maybe it's just me, but man, Bridges' delivery of "Not anymore" is downright goosebumps-inducing.

It actually made me like the film more than the film itself did, just to see Jeff Bridges' character seeming to take a bit of Obie Stane* to heart there. I hear tell that Flynn's apparently been in gameworld so long that he's gone full-on Col. Kurtz. Awesome. Between that and the prospect of more Boxleitner and that's one ticket fucking bought.

Man, Jeff Bridges is one of those actors who possesses the most double-edged kind of brilliance. He's so good that no one notices. He's just so natural, not showy at all. He deserves way more praise than he gets.




Now, for the main reason I called you all here today.

american_arcane posted this latest bit of utter and complete amazing awesomeness on his Facebook. To quote Ren Hoek: "I'M. SO. HAPPY!"

The Ballad of G.I. Joe from Olivia Wilde

( Full cast behind the cut, just so all the awesome surprises aren't spoiled )

I've always had a strange love for G.I. JOE, just because of the characters. How they all had such rich backstories and personalities. I adore them all, no matter what form they come in, be it the cheesy show, the legitimately far-better-than-you'd-ever-expect Marvel Comics by Larry Hama, epically brain-breaking three-part Fringe musicals, god I'm STILL recovering from COBRA: THE MUSICAL, PART III... heck, I'm seriously tempted to see the film, which is either awful or awesomely stupid, depending on who you ask.

Hell, I almost can't even consider it a parody. Of course Cobra Commander loves 70's boogie and would force Three Dog Night to reunite. The guy was a used car salesman, for god's sake! Seriously! It's canon and everything!




EDIT OF JUSTICE:

Now I can truly go to bed happy and fulfilled until the crushing disappointment that always sinks in not long after waking in the morning. Yay!!!





*I wish I could remember who it was that noted how Stane in IRON MAN was just the nicest Marvel villain ever. "Tony! How're you doing, buddy? Hey, I have pizza! YOU CAN'T HAVE ANY! Nah, I'm just kiddin'! Hey, lookit me, I got a Segway, wheeeeeeee! Hey, is that your heart? Mind if I FUCKING RIP IT OUT K TNX HAHAHA IS EVIL."