thehefner | for bored people like shadowcaptain and <lj site="livejournal.com

In honor of the newly-decreed International LiveJournal Fail To Suck Day, I present to you a handful of unproduced movie scripts, two excellent bits of unproduced missed opportunities, and two utter trainwreck twin missed bullets thank Christ they were not made.

SUPERMAN LIVES, by Kevin Smith. I actually haven't read it yet, but have heard only awesome things.

BATMAN: YEAR ONE, by Frank Miller. Remember how cool we all thought it was gonna be to have a Batman Year One movie directed by Darren Aronofsky and written by Frank Miller? I think we all kinda forgot somewhere along the line that Miller completely lost his once-brilliant touch somewhere around making "That Yellow Bastard," and this script is testament to how lucky we all truly were to have gotten BATMAN BEGINS instead.

WATCHMEN, by Sam Hamm. Terry Gilliam spent, like, fifteen years struggling to figure out how to make a movie of WATCHMEN, and this script, by original Batman screenwriter Sam Hamm, was reportedly the best of the bunch. That's the really sad part. The good news is apparently the current script by David Hayter is absolutely brilliant and even Moore says it's the best one yet made (not that he approves anyway, of course), and the team is still dedicated to making the film and doing it right. So we'll see if that happens. Because even if it was directed by Gilliam, this WATCHMEN would have just been sorely lacking to say the least.

DAY OF THE DEAD, by George A. Romero. This is the ORIGINAL big-budget script that was severely re-written for the final version. Many elements from this script were later incorporated into this year's LAND OF THE DEAD, but many Romero and zombie fans feel this original script would have been a masterpiece, especially compared to the much-maligned final version of the movie. Of course, me, DAY is still my favorite, in no small part to the special effects and, of course, Bub. In the original script, Bub isn't as loveable, save for one tender scene. He's even a sharp-shooting slap-leather badass. But Bub isn't the main character in either case, and the script is still truly a wonder to behold.

Enjoy, fellas. My only regret is that I couldn't track down the real script to BUCKAROO BANZAI VERSUS THE WORLD CRIME LEAGUE.