that probably explains why there was no second date

[thehefner]

So I recently realized what may have gone wrong with my attempts to court the cute hippie chick. Having her over to my house wasn't the biggest mistake, nor was my decision to show her THE NINTH CONFIGURATION. And I know many of you are rolling your eyes at that one, but no, it wasn't as stupid a choice as it might seem. I chose it for a very good reason that pertained to her interests! I just don't remember exactly why. But that's all besides the point.

No, I think the main flub of the evening came when we were on my bed, watching the movie and getting close, and I noticed she had a tear in her jeans. This particular tear was way, wayyyy up at the very top of her legs, an inch or so higher than Daisy Dukes would be, had they been cut off all the way. You know, a tear that revealed a nice window to her butt.

So in an attempt to be witty and flirty, I pointed to the tear, smiled, and remarked:

"I like your butt hole."

...

It was weeks before I realized what I said.

Clearly, I need to work that into a story. I just don't know where.

Comments

[suburbfabulous.livejournal.com]

Classy broads are a dying breed, indeed.
And the Filipina would only be paying him to marry her; I doubt they'd hang out much.
And yes, the mental picture of our boy slapping someone down, particularly while talking game shit in Tagalog, makes me smile like the first five minutes of HOUSE ON HAUNTED HILL.

[kali921.livejournal.com]

I picture him doing this in a top hat. I have no idea why.

[suburbfabulous.livejournal.com]

You know, I do too.
And I know why: because Hef will always wear a top hat, in my mind.
What would surprise me more would be if he DIDN'T.

[thehefner.livejournal.com]

I'm more of a bowler derby man right now. My poor top hat is falling apart, and I've yet to find a new one of such exceptional quality and stiffness.

[suburbfabulous.livejournal.com]

You know, there's a wonderful hatter here in New Haven.