Jason's Big Day

[thehefner]

Thank god someone loaded this today, so I was able to post this just under the wire:

Don't it just warm the cockles of your heart? I mean, before Jason stabs you through said cockles?

I was considering giving a full, thoughtful review for the new FRIDAY THE 13TH, but frankly, I don't think anyone else really cares, much less gets all warm and fuzzy at the thought of this unstoppable special-ed zombie.*

Suffice it to say, the new FRIDAY pleased me. The people giving it bad reviews are the ones who completely miss the point. They might as well try reviewing porn movies. It's not a real movie, it's FRIDAY THE GODDAMNED 13TH! And as a Jason movie, it absolutely succeeded.

Also, it features a character who really could join the ranks of the all-time great assholes. Not quite at Walter Peck from GHOSTBUSTERS levels, but definitely somewhere around Paul Reiser in ALIENS, and Anthony Michael Hall in EDWARD SCISSORHANDS. Even though the film failed to deliver a truly satisfying death for him ala Rhodes in DAY OF THE DEAD, let's just say that Travis Van Winkle may just be the Scream Queen of 2009.


*Dang it, I just want Jason displaced and put in other situations. Like, fighting Uruk-Hai. Or Aliens! Imagine Jason getting attacked by a facehugger: before the alien baby can burst out, he just does the practical thing and stabs himself in the gut repeatedly. Dead alien baby bleeds acid, burns its way out, plops to the ground, and Jason moves on to battle the Queen with a machete.

Come on, I can't be the ONLY one who's in a happy place with this visual!

Comments

[swimpenguin.livejournal.com]

I'm surprised that video is still up-I've tried to search for numerous Robot Chicken videos and they're either not up at all, or have been pulled.
That said, I love that one-shaking off the blood and putting his machete in the umbrella stand!
I don't plan to see the movie though-I saw the same people remake of Texas Chainsaw Massacre, and I want those 2 hours of my soul back.
(The original TCM [I wonder if TCM has ever aired on the channel TCM?] is probably the only movie I've not finished because I literally couldn't-disturbed/revolted me too much on a mental and visual level. I understand it's cult classic-ness, but GAH! no, I can not watch that movie.)

[thehefner.livejournal.com]

Bear in mind, I absolutely loathed the TCM remake. I consider the original a work of art (it's virtually gore-less, and not a slasher film at all, but a psychological ordeal), but their remake was crass, ugly, nasty, artless, ugly, disgusting, cheap, and lousy. Only last week did I realize... they turned THE TEXAS CHAINSAW MASSACRE into a FRIDAY THE 13TH movie.

So really, them doing a Jason film is rather perfect. No, it's not a good movie, but neither were any of the Jason films! They've made a rather near-perfect throwback slasher film, so I can't fault them for it, even though I'll never forgive them for the disgusting piece of shit that their TCM remake was.

Definitely see the original at some point, if you get the chance. Actually, I think it's all on YouTube. I recommend watching it either there or on VHS, but not on DVD. The grainier it is, the better! It's disturbing and offensive, yes, but in a *good* way! Unlike the remake. A fine line, that.

[swimpenguin.livejournal.com]

Heh I wasn't quite clear-I've seen most of the movie-from the beginning on some indie movie channel, and about the point where he puts her up on the hook, I switched to something else and periodically switched back to the movie every few minutes, until I watched it fully again around where she starts running through the cornfield, to the very end. I was too disturbed by it to watch it fully...I knew it was a fictional movie, but I felt like, the grainy, bare bones way it was filmed, that I was watching some documentary/long lost piece of snuff film (which of course is the interpretation they were going for originally) and it just disturbed me too much, like I was actually watching these people get hunted down and tortured in real time. So in that case, kudos to the film makers for instilling their intentions in my viewing experience. But I'll still quiver in a corner and switch to Justice League cartoons and never watch it again.